Run Date: 13th July 2020
Run No #2071
Hare: Piccolo
Venue: 82 Grendon Street North Mackay
Hashers: 25
Twenty five eager souls gathered under the impressive shadow of Piccolo’s towering Queenslander as the night air grew heavier and colder.
After much filibustering and posturing, a few reluctant reprobates dragged themselves away from the fire pit to mill around Piccolo’s driveway entrance like a bunch hapless water buffalo wallowing in a top-end rainstorm in readiness to receive their written instructions.
Whilst Piccolo’s distribution of her eight envelopes of run instructions could hardly be called strategic nor military like, but none the less, it was achieved (eventually).
Run directions given were clear and straight forward which resulted in a relatively uneventful yet moderately lengthy run, and that’s where the uneventfulness ended.
A circle was formed before JCF, sporting a raft of lower-leg injuries, apparently suffered while attempting to negotiate the hard flat surface of Piccolo’s driveway, arrested Monk duties off Tarzan. JCF’s Norman Gunstan-like performance was occasionally punctuated by activities such as a welcome to some new runners, a down-down for a visiting runner – Weak as Piss (who has apparently had more Hash names than Pharlap had starts) plus Streaker got in on the act momentarily and furnished JCF with some tie-on shlong.
No sooner than an excruciatingly poor rendition of the club song was finished, Nicker Licker, as part of his taper for selection into the dive team for the up-coming Tokyo Olympics, launched himself from Piccolo’s internal staircase and performed a double summersault finished off with a triple pike while holding a large crockery dish full of Hash nosh. Whilst a fiercely impressive human physical feat, it was the sound effects emanating from his attempt at such a difficult maneuver that caught every ones attention.
The loud bang certainly aroused the attention of a large ferocious-looking white dog, who bounded out of a lower floor door, briefly gazed left at some very tasty offerings on the floor at the base of the staircase, but out of his right eye, caught a glimpse of salt and pepper fluffy poodles, who he considered would go very nice as a garnish on top of the recently presented smorgasbord- a couple of nervous moments until the said white dog was corralled back inside.
Meanwhile, the Hash Emergency Response Team sprang into action with military-like precision, and instantaneously, 24 mobile phones jammed the emergency services number in an effort to call an ambulance – would have been 25 if Nicker Licker could have found his phone, but it is speculated that during his unorthodox decent of the stairs, his phone got jammed up his arse.
Successful contact was finally made with QAS and a unit was dispatched. In the meantime, Nicker was ably assisted by a number of capable bodies including Top Knot and Half-a-Boat. The injured party was eventually evacuated from the site and taken to the local hospital to have his mobile phone surgically removed from his arse.
Good to see Hash keeps on giving!!
Smut
