Run Date: 20th June 2016
Run No #1861
Hare: Smegma & Blurry
Venue: Dunrock Boat Ramp
Hashers: 22
Following 24 hours of severe rain, 22 brave Hashers ventured out to the darkest deep south of the Mackay region, to the little known village of Dunrock….. I don’t usually go that far on holidays!
Darkness was settling in as the crew arrived, to find Smeg, Blurry and Snot ensconced around an already blazing fire, beers in hand. General chitchat and bullshit abounded, until Smeg announced it was time to begin. He then launched into the longest pre-run ramble ever heard….. something about left, right, trail, track….. orange tape, pink tape, sheeez, no one was listening and no one cared. He did prove once again to be the Bushel of Bullshit, as the promised school bus failed to appear. So, off we went on foot, and soon turned onto what appeared to be an established walking trail built by The Mackay Conservation Group, or some other lesser known Govt body, complete with arrows to show the way…… which Smeg conveniently added tape to…… instant trail indeed!
On through the dark, with torches blazing, faint calls of OnOn from the lead pack, until we came to the end of the trail, and entered a vast grassy plain. Did I mention it had been raining the day before? Torrential rain, the kind of rain that soaks in and floods everything? Well….. that grassy plain hid it’s watery secret well…. Until we came sloshing through. Many cries of despair were heard, especially when rustling was heard nearby, creating images of giant Tiapans and gianter Crocs, then Flaps sunk to his knees and declared “I can’t go on!” Viagra and myself hauled him to his feet and pushed him along…… to the other side of the wet tundra, where a gleeful Smeg met us, having secretly shortcutted around the swamp. As we found the road, we encountered the lead pack coming slowly from the scrub…… muttering something about no trail and fuckn Smeg and wet feet, and other disparaging remarks. And if it wasn’t wet enough, Cummalott decided to squat down and water the trees some more!
Back at the boatramp, with 2 fires now blazing, the general bullshit continued as the cash was collected, until Flaps, now fully recovered and upright, called for the circle to be formed. A quick joke from the Monk, then Blurry and Hotrocks were ceremoniously Tun’d for wearing hats in the circle. Blurry and Smeg were called forth to enjoy a Tun downdown for their efforts, or lack thereof, as joint hares….. A couple more jokes, and then a birthday Tun for the birthday boys, Zorro and Daffodil. Some jokes from Golly and Flaps, and a charge from Hotrocks which led to downdowns for Shocker and Sweatmeat for pinching each other’s bums on the trail, not realizing Hotrocks was between them! A charge from Knicker caused Viagra to partake of a Tun, but I can’t remember why. Drip Tray was called forth to explain how she had lost the Hash Dildo. There was some suggestion it may have been lost during use, although this was vigorously denied. A soothing Tun was administered.
A downdown was awarded to Hotrocks for daring to interrupt the Monk who, after more jokes, found we had a Tun left over, so….. a downdown was issued for “returning runner” Zorro. After an extremely confused rendition of the Hash Song, the Circle closed and masterchef Blurry declared nosh was on…… 2 big pots of Blurry’s Special Slop……rice, sausages, vegetables in a curry sauce, which went down a treat on a cold night. More bullshit was dribbled as the beers was drunk until the pack slowly ambled off into the night, leaving the 3 Amigos staring balefully into the fire(s).
OnOn until next week, Pensioner.
