Date – 01/04/2024
Run – 2268
Hare – Pensioner
Venue – John Breen Park, North Mackay
Hashers: 14

Hi Hashers.

We all, 14 off us gathered at John Breen Park for run 2268, all ready for a good set out run, set by one off our finest hares. We all got mustered up to be told that the hare had it from Livio that it would be a waste of chalk as it would be washed out.

So, we were to have a Live Hare “Pensioner”. Of we set through the park, on to the road, not to far, some 50m when the so-called Hare said “you’re on your own” and went back to the esky, leaving the pack to decide who to lead us. On down the path to the first crossing, some went over, the others kept going to the next pathway.

We all found our way back to the booze and dip, no crackers as Pensioner had a man look and could not find them in the second bag.

Circled called. No history lesson, very disappointing, charges taken, Pensioner we all know what for. Tar Boy for pole dancing and others I can’t remember, some jokes and stories, song sung.

Food came out, Savory Mince and Potato Bake, very nice, Mango. Dessert – biscuits.  We all stood around and got all the go, on what to expect, if you get covid, from our one and only Uturn.

See you at Shoal Point Monday.

ON_ON GOLLY. 

                        

                      

 

Date – 25/03/20234
Run -2267
Hare – Tonguer
Venue – 12 Hill End Road, Glenella
Hashers: 12

HashTrash 2267….Tonguer’s joint

Having heard on the grapevine that Tonguer WASN’T firing up the pizza oven, the usual hashers stayed away in droves, leaving a rather motley ragtag mob of 12 to carry on the traditional hash. The first thing we spotted on arrival was a very bedraggled looking Curlew laying on the concrete in front of said pizza oven. Surely not curlew pizza? Nah, not even Tonguer could be that cruel.

Shocker decided to drive into the backyard of Mum n Dad’s place, and immediately threw up on the lawn, then disappeared into Mummies arms, and upstairs into his childhood room, not to be seen again all night.

Realizing no one else was coming Tonguer herded us out the gate and mumbled something about chalk and arrows, so off we went. Soon discovering the arrows had no heads, instead being simple white lines here and there. Knicker and myself decided to short cut back to the beer, when bugger me, front runner Corgi caught us up, which put us firmly in line for a place on the podium…. If we had a podium, and if we was competitive.

Cash collected, it was circle time. Hmmm. No monk. And no monkee. Zorro! Step up. Which he did. No history lesson tonight. A few quick down downs and a coupla jokes and it was singsong time and over.  Tonguer and his good wife Wendy then lugged down a pile of tucker, enough to feed an army. A pot of spuds, another of taco type mince, bowls of tomato, lettuce, cheese…. All followed by apple crumble. Which all meant plenty leftovers for Tonguer in the next few weeks.

Plenty of yarns from the faithful few over the next hour or so, and then everyone started to trickle off home.

Next week it’s off to our favorite park Jim Beam…..er, I mean John Breen, North Mackay.

OnOn

Pensch.

 

Date – 18/03/2024
Run -2266
Hare – Piccolo
Venue – 82 Grendon Street, North Mackay
Hashers: 23

A good herd of hashers strolled into Piccolo’s for Run 2266.

Off out front, with Piccolo leading the way around North Mackay, for tonight’s run and returning with all the hashers eventually.

Numerous returning runners in tonight, and beers sculled by the thirsty ones out front.

Hashy birthday chocolates for Snot, and Insex for last week.

2 Sausage hot pots for Nosh and wafer biscuits for sweets, proved to be plenty enough for all the hungry hashers, even harder to believe, leftovers!

Thank you, Piccolo.

On On

Matches.

 

 

 

Date – 11/03/2024
Run – 2265
Hare – Juice
Venue – 12 Barclays Road, Dumbleton
Hashers: 16

An interested bunch of hashers turned up tonight for the run.

The Hare set us off around the perimeter of their green pastures, and the grass was rather sodden in places, onto the 3 hills down Barclays Road. The good hashers were rewarded with a piss stop of a Butterscotch Liqueur mix.

Back at Juice and Termite’s abode for nosh to eat, beers to drink, a possible jab from Piccolo’s brolly.

To finish the evening, Juice gave the hashers a treat, a very nice iced chocolate cup cake, for each of us.

Thankyou Juice and Termite.

On On Matches.         

                   

Date – 04 March 2024
Run – 2264
Hare – Snot
Venue – 19 Tern Street, Slade Point
Hashers: 16

Always a pleasant outlook from Tern Street and the Hare promised a beachified urban stroll. The group kept together until the end of Tern Street with a car appearing to shepherd us from behind. It was creepy but the car finally inched past with Snot at the wheel. The car turned to the right down Slade Point Road and the hesitant hashers were able to then set their course eastwards.

Before the walk the hare had informed us that the trail was marked on the LHS and so it was, very clearly. It was difficult to keep track of which streets we passed along as there were many – Ibis, Lyrebird, Rosella, Magpie meshed into one. Maybe we didn’t even enter those streets, who knows??  The front walkers appeared to have set a speedy pace in spite of the warm afternoon and soon the walkers were strung out. The Slade Point Nature Reserve loomed ahead but thankfully the Hare led us elsewhere away from mosquitoes, scummy water, mud, frogs etc.  Eventually, after turning many corners the piss stop came into view on a vacant allotment. We had it on good authority that the brew was a mixture of all sorts. After the natterers who had been at the back of the pack quenched their thirst, we set off for the short distance home.

Back at Tern St we delved into crackers and a very edible dip. Smut rounded up the crew for the circle but the Monkee was otherwise engaged and had to be called to order (he’d had a busy weekend and workday). Once drinks were set up we were treated to a historical account from Smut on the Hindenburg which appeared to be more interesting than the usual fare, Unfortunately for hashers standing at the back of the circle Snot sprayed the exposed part of his head with a tropical strength repellent and fumigated both mosquitoes and people.  You might say it was a slow evening but that was because Flaps was resting on his laurels and was not prepared with a joke. In the end he told a joke that I didn’t get and I don’t want anyone to explain it to me either!!  The monk deftly returned attention to the circle when Snot, Shocker, Golly chatted about a boat seen on the walk. They obviously found it to be more interesting than the night’s proceedings. The monk also had to use his negotiation skills around some of the charges. I don’t know what else happened because I was dealing with the after effects of fumigation and I was ready to eat.

And eat we did. Thinly sliced corned meat, boiled potatoes (boiled to perfection says Termite) and a more please white sauce. Definitely a fitting end to the evening, Insex and Snot.

ON ON

JUICE

                       

Date – 26/02/2024
Run – 2263
Hare – Screw
Venue – Mackay Bowls Club
Hashers: 18

Let’s start by congratulating Zorro on approving a pub run, -it’s he forgot to send it to hash cash but all went well, we all bought draft beer for free.

I’d estimate that there were probably between 18-20 hashers there, as there was confusion on my part being that we visited HotRocks and Driptray for a piss stop. Also, we had a guest of honour, Baagoose, he appeared quite well although he reminded me of Joe Biden at times.

Circle opened by Smut who gave us his usual history lesson about bygone years, once again we were all enthralled by past events and look forward to next weeks thrilling episode of a bygone era.

Fines. Returning runners: Prick & Baagoose.

There were a few others but inconsequential in the scheme of things. We then partook in the culinary delights as served a few thousand runs prior. A bonus was the gluten free Tim Tams for the fussy tummies of a few of us.

There were a few jokes, and usual banter then I got tired and went home.

On On

Snot 

Jokes

**Every time a little boy went to a playmate’s house, he found the grandmother deeply engrossed in her bible. Finally, his curiosity got the better of him.
“Why do you suppose your grandmother reads the bible so much?” He asked.
I’m not sure”, said his friend, “But I think she’s cramming for her finals”.

**Rushing up to a large airline’s counter, a man gasped, “Miss, please help me. I have to get to Chicago in the worst way!” The clerk calmly pointed to the left and said, “Sir, that would be the airline next to us.”

**“Nothing looks good to me anymore,” wailed a customer modelling an outfit in front of the department store’s mirror. “Nonsense, ma’am,” soothed the salesclerk. “That dress says it all.” “That’s the problem,” the woman replied “I need a dress that keeps its mouth shut.”

**Restaurant Patron: “Waiter, I’d like a bottle of wine:
Waiter: “What year, sir?”
Patron: “Well, I’d like it right now”

 

                          

                      

 

Date – 19/02/2024
Run – 2262
Hare – Smut
Venue – 57 Bradman Drive, Glenella
Hashers: 19

19 eagers hashers turned up at Smut’s abode on a warm and cloudy night. The Hare called us out front to give directions adding there was a piss-stop. The pack headed off to find the promised piss-stop. Soon they came across a police siege and after having a captain cook they scurried along, following the trail to a piss-stop and then on home.

The bullshite muttering started amongst them until the Monk called the circle. There was the ‘usual’ history lesson, charges, some jokes and stories were told. No news from the GM or On Sec. The song was sung and the circle closed.

Nosh was served and very tasty it was – the usual Tim Tams for desserts. Some more piss was drunk and shite talked, until it was time to head home. Thanks for your hospitality Smut!

See you next week at the Mackay Bowls Club in the back car park on Nebo Road.

On-On Screw!

                      

 

Date – 12/02/2024
Run – 2261
Hare – Shocker
Venue – The Park, Sturt Crescent, Settlers Rise.
Hashers: 15

We were the second last to arrive at Sturt Crescent Park followed by Termite less Juice, who was away partying in Brisbane. The sun was still glaring down on us, so just past six we checked Tarzans watch and yes 69 degrees would have called time to go Tarzan recalled.

Shocker said he was doing live hare tonight due to the rain overnight. We missed seeing Landen on his scooter beside Shocker. Off we headed towards the entrance to go up and around to the first view point and then down and around and up to the highest view point which made the heart rate go up. The last hill was too much for some and they headed home instead of reaching the drink stop at the next park. The air clear, you could smell the fires in the back yards pushing out black smoke. At the drink stop Shocker produced a concoction of solo and plenty of gin he warned us. Just six of us completed the whole run, the SCB’s would taste the concoction for their down downs.

Back at Shockers we found Flaps, Nicker, Snot & Insex looking after the fire for tonight’s BBQ. Yes, sausages for a change with tomatoes, cheese, fried onions, sauces and bread.

I think Shocker likes popcorn. Nibbles of cheese, pickled onions, black & green olives, dried tomatoes and Jatz biscuits followed by popcorn filled us up before the circle. No Smut tonight, Shocker was doing it all. Golly helped out with the down downs. Charges were for the short cutters and Pensioner and Tonguer who didn’t turn up for Executive Lunch last week. Jokes/ Stories were told by Insex and Flaps. Circle over and song sung Shocker cooked the sausages and onions which went down a treat followed by Tim Tams. Stars still out, there was a light sprinkle of rain and then it stopped and we enjoyed the rest of the night.

On On

Corgi & Daffodil

Date – 05/02/2024
Run – 2260
Hare – Nicka Licka
Venue – 16 Dolby Court, North Mackay
Hashers: 22

A bunch of Hashers short cut through the back road into the mowed paddock which gave us plenty of parking at Knicka Licka’s place. A good number had gathered and with the recent rain Knicka set a Letter Run. Off we went, through the street and made our way to the Gooseponds and had a Hash Holt. Once everyone’s thirst was quenched at the piss stop, it was on Home for Beers and Nibbles. Knicka had some great home-made Salsa, that had plenty of kick to it. Circle was formed and plenty of charges. Flaps for hitting up old Grannies.  Tonguer, Golly and Pensioner for getting a car park straight away at the 12.29 Executive Lunch after Flaps had spent 15 minutes driving around and having to walk 1 km to the Hot Wok. Another charge for Pussy Fucker for arriving late and missing the run. Plenty of other chargers and Returning Runners, Smut and Termite.   Plenty of great jokes. Song sung and Circle closed. Hash nosh was a great Cottage Pie, Mint Salad and Tim Tams. Thanks Knicka for putting on a great run last minute. See you all next Monday.

Shocker.

                        

                      

Date – 29/01/2024
Run – 2259
Hare – Matches
Venue – 35 Graves Street, North Mackay
Hashers: 20

I have experimented with many ways of describing what the weather was like on Monday evening but have finally decided on ” it was bloody hot “.

20 not so enthusiastic Hashers shuffled out the back gate, following the pack on Matches back which contained the piss stop and the assurance that it was a short trail. When we reached the PS where the expectation of a large refreshments of cool liquid awaited to replace the sweat we had lost getting there, only to be greeted with shots of unwanted booze from another cupboard clean out from the Zorro/Matches abode.  The redeeming factor was that it was highly alcoholic so after one sip we no longer gave a shit and induced a fast pace back to the cold beverages awaiting in the back of Flaps’s truck.

Slurp slurp gargle sounds, until finally the conversation restarted with the main conversation being THE BLOODY WEATHER then it degenerated into the usual crap.

Then Shocker once again, vainly trying to gain his minute of fame, interrupted proceedings by calling for the circle and then trying grow his tenuous control by falsely accusing Nicka of falsely over-talking him, BLAH BLAH. Then he turned his attention to the hare, Pussy F, returning runner’s & others.  News about Bargoose, he is back from Bowen and is able to have visitors. 

A few more pearls of wisdom, which I have forgotten, then the Hash song and into the tucker. 

After the silence of tucker and a few more drinks, the exodus started and the evening was over.

After being rudely bullied, the run next week is at Nicka’s.    I WILL GET MY REVENGE   !!!!

Nicka 

On On