Run Date: 30th November, 2019
Run No #2048
Hare: Trail Mistress McFanny
Venue: @ Delicious’s 117 Tropical Ave Andergrove
Hashers: 23 

Everyone had a great time, and if you didn’t it was your own fault !!

Hooker  took a couple of spills during the night, and now has a nasty looking graze on her leg,

I guess she was sober or so she said !!

Delicious and myself REALLY enjoyed the jelly shooters at the Piss stop! and Delicious is still enjoying them!

Secret Santa Tonto was fun not the usual crap! Although someone stole my xmas pudding, and I now have to build a 6+ CACTUS.

Mcfanny Trail Master was charged . Run was too long, It’s just around the block she says ! 40 mins later!!

Circle was full of charges.

Knothead made a grand appearance, and told his usual piss poor joke!!!!

Oui Oui (Wee Wee) supplied a superb light display!

Thanks Delicious for supplying the venue & to all the Hashers who helped with the catering to make it such a festive feast! 

I think the last hashers went home about 1am

                                   MERRY CHRISTMAS  all you Hashers.

                                                    GM Streaker.

P.S Lots of photos were taken and have been loaded by Teflon somehow!! Not my department!!!####

 

 

  

 

  

  

  

  

 

 

 

 

 

  

 

 

 

 

  

  

 

Run Date: 25^th November, 2019
Run No #2047
Hare: Golly & Raggedy Ann
Venue: 4 Trochus Court, Shoal Point
Hashers: 22    

20 plus runners travelled from near and far to the big smoke of Shoal Point.

The run started with the normal everyone waiting for the ON ON or which way

Raggetty Anne was heading.  Getting caught on my first false trail, was back on track

and heading onwards zigzagging down roads. Second false trail was heading towards

the beach.  JCF seeing my direction took it decided to short cut down to the beach with visitors

M.D. and Kennel following along.  Hearing the on back I returned to trail and continued on to see Fill de Jaw and Wheelie Bin flying by in the car running late cause Wheelie didn’t want to get out of the pool I’m with you mate.  On On up the road to the piss stop and the best treats compliments from Flaps thanks. Another little loop and back home to the On On. 

Crackers and dip then the circle was called.  Hare got a score of 4 for his run from Kennel and was given his down down. Visitors were charged and Half a Boat took the charge for the return of the Holy Grail that Chop Sticks just gave to the enemy because they asked for it.  Can’t remember other charges there were jokes don’t remember them either but remembered the club song and circle was closed. Followed by ham, chicken and salad rolls just right for this weather. More beers were drunk and tim tams to finish off at which time I was off like Mum’s knickers on Dad’s day.

ON ON Lassie.

 

Run Date: 18th November, 2019
Run No #2046
Hare: Tonguer
Venue: 12 Hill End Road, Glenella
Hashers: 28

We all gathered a Hills End ready for Tounger’s Run not sure what colour paint we would be running on. But the old Hare fooled us and set a more common run in lime and chalk. All headed out front, where a few more starters met us out front pushing prams good to see they are training new Hashers. Off we set past the hall where they were trying to lose weight or just getting away from cooking dinner. Around a few blocks than through cane this is where we lost Wheelie, some others parted earlier, no names. Back to Pizza Man Cave but before dinner, the circle had to be done some jokes, charges and welcome of new runners to MH3 from Rockhampton/Gladstone Dobba and Hairtrigger and Hash Horrors. Piccolo’s birthday. Wendy had all the pizza’s set up ready for the oven, they looked good even before burning them to eat. Say no more, they didn’t have time to hit the table and they were all gone, everyone had their fill. Drank all the beer, only fruit juice left.

Good night, see you at 4 Trochus Ct Shoal Point.

ON-ON GOLLY.

Hash Horrors x 2

Run Date: 11th November 2019
Run No #2045
Hare: Hooker with JCF 
Venue: 5 Margaret Grant Place Mt Pleasant 
Hashers: 24

 

24 ardent and eager hashers arrived in the bowels of North Mackay for the run of the year. Hooker was in the new abode and the intent was to initiate the venue [ and the neighbours ] to the merits of Hash.

A start was made down the street, round the corner and then via a drain to the Gooseponds. The drain was not wheelchair friendly, so Wheelie had to divert via an adjacent suburb so he could join the run. The Equal Rights people would not have been impressed, but after all this was Hash. Along the Gooseponds, through the Greenfield area, onto the road near A Mart , and then bck to the creek and on home. 

Some points. No hills. No mud. No grass. No fuss! Well marked if you like that sort of thing.

The On On circle was administered by Tarzan, there were a few jokes- Tonguer and Flaps – down down for Hooker’s house mate Simon – a few other down downs, a few charges , a great feed, a few beers and then it was on on home to Mummy. Cheers. Prick. 

 

     

Run Date: 4th November 2019
Run No #2044
Hare: Zorro
Venue: Mackay Fencing 70 Satellite Crescent Mackay Harbour
Hashers: 21

 

An enthusiastic crowd of 21 spritely hashers (including our newly named Chop sticks), gathered at Zorro’s Outer Harbour place of business keen to see what treats lay ahead on yet another beautiful North Queensland Monday evening.

We set out on a path explained vaguely by the Hare who led us to believe the he’d gone to the trouble of setting 2 runs? What the? And facing opposite directions??

I heard people muttering ‘full of shit’ as they wandered off in safe numbers, keen to avoid the barbed-wire-fence-fiasco & swarms of midges they were subjected at his LAST run.

What started off to be a pleasant run, could have had a dreadful outcome for the author – alias:’ Hooker the short cutter’. Such were we absorbed in hashy-gossip, that we took a wrong feckin turn. Thank God Raggedy-Ann alerted Teflon & I to the fact that we were headed in the direction with only one way out: the track of past-run best forgotten, filled with nothing but horrors, pain & misery.  Phew, thanks Raggedy – longest walk I’ve done for a while, 40 minutes a record, but at least thanks to you,  we got back in one piece

We were excited to get back to a yummy dip make by Matches & to find that Fork had organized a Melbourne Cup sweep – turned out to be a pretty shitty sweep really cause me, Teflon & Raggedy  won noting L Pretty sure McFanny, Lassie & Tounger are happy about raking in the money though. Thanks Fork for a great job.

Our honourable monk called the circle with myself filling in as a surprisingly talented Monkee. Chrissy party’s sorted for the 30^th at Delicious’ place 5.30. Charges were given to those-who-must-be-punished (even though our trusty GM choked on hers) & some pretty tame jokes flowed. Never thought I say it,  but I kinda miss the discussing jokes from  Peau Beau & Knothead. A Hello and Good-bye Charge given to TJ & Returning runner JCF. 

Hash nosh was frankly amazing – who ever would of thought you had it in you Zorro? I believe I did miss out on the best part though – some of Flaps creations my favourite Rocky Road and Cherry Slice. Why did I leave early? 

Great night – On! On! Till next week

Hooker

     

Run Date: 28th October 2019
Run No #2043
Hare: Live Hare –  Streaker
Venue: 5/3 Hunter Street West Mackay
Hashers: 24

Winner of the Raffle to raise funds for Motor Neuron Disease – The raffle raised $255.00 in total, cash handed over to Pensioner for the Motor Neuron Disease foundation walk this Sunday 03.11.2019.

1st Prize – Chopsticks (Fire Pig) – Half a Boat’s other half

2nd Prize – Hooker (Large White Sweet Potato) – very upset that she didn’t win the Fire Pig!

3rd Prize – Tonto (Little Car) 

Delicious with a charge

    

 

A SIGN IN A SHOE REPAIR STORE IN VANCOUVER THAT READ:   “We will heel you We will save your sole We will even dye for you.” Sign over a Gynecologist’s Office: “Dr. Jones, at your cervix.”; In a Podiatrist’s office:     “Time wounds all heels.”; On a Septic Tank Truck : Yesterday’s Meals on Wheels At an Optometrist’s Office : “If you don’t see what you’re looking for, You’ve come to the right place.”; On a Plumber’s truck  : “We repair what your husband fixed.”; On another Plumber’s truck : “Don’t sleep with a drip. Call your plumber.”; At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee  : “Invite us to your next blowout.”; On an Electrician’s truck : “Let us remove your shorts.”; In a Non-smoking Area:   “If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and will take appropriate action.”; On a Maternity Room door : “Push. Push. Push.”; At a Car Dealership : “The best way to get back on your feet – miss a car payment.”; Outside a Muffler Shop:   “No appointment necessary. We hear you coming.”; In a Veterinarian’s waiting room : “Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!”; At the Electric Company:   “We would be delighted if you send in your payment on time. However, if you don’t, YOU will be de-lighted.” In a Restaurant window:   “Don’t stand there and be hungry; come on in and get fed up.”; In the front yard of a Funeral Home : “Drive carefully. We’ll wait.”; At a Propane Filling Station: “Thank Heaven for little grills.”; In a Chicago Radiator Shop:   “Best place in town to take a leak.”; And the best one for last…;   Sign on the back of another Septic Tank Truck: “Caution – This Truck is full of Political Promises”   Next week’s run from Mackay fencing yard Bring repellent and chairs   On On  Zorro

Run Date: 21st October 2019
Run No #2042 AGPU
Hare: Trail Mistress
Venue: Mackay Bowls Club Nebo Road 
Hashers: 29

All arrived at the Mackay Bowls Club for the AGPU, off we trotted on our walk down George Street across to Evan Street meeting up at the Piss Stop Rotunda on the cnr Evans & Milton Sts where a good brew had been mixed. Back to the Bowlsie where the bar was open for all to enjoy a drink and mingle. Pensh took his place taking the $$$ and beside him was Delicious helping with the raffle tickets for the Fire Pig to raise money for Motor Neuron Disease. The raffle is drawn next Monday night 28/10. 

Couple of jokes for the evening until the GM took the floor and started with the Birthday song for Mango & Raggedy for their decade birthdays! Congratulations girls. 

GM went on and put it to all Hashers that the existing committee be allowed to take the reins for another 12 months. This was accepted (some wanting them to take it on for 5 years!) Congratulations to all the Committee. 

We were called into our dinner so off into the dining area where a great BBQ had been prepared and we relaxed and enjoyed. 

The Monk appeared dressed in his attire for a Christening who was Annie (Half a Boat’s other half). Annie did as she was told and knelt down and received her baptism with beer crossed on her head and in her hair and gracefully accepted her name as ‘Chopsticks’. We all welcomed Chopsticks into the fold as she made her way around the mob. 

GM then presented the awards which are as follows:- 

Wheelie took the cake for his expressions on receiving the plague of the pin up girl! 

1. Wheelie Bin – Dirty Old Man Award – for sucking on Prick of the week and snogging all the Harriettes.
2. Prick –  The ‘Nev the Pieman Mushy Peas Award’ 
3. Daffodil -The Nothing Better to do on a Monday Night Award’ – with 48 runs 
4. Blurry – The ‘I don’t go that Far on My Annual Holidays Award’  for making us trek down to Salonika Beach
5. Hooker – The ‘Where do you live now Award’ – for moving 3 times in a year.
6. Delicious – 22Run – ‘best fancy dress’ Hash night
7. Fill de Jaw – Pocket Rocket – ‘can manoeuvre that wheelchair in just about any terrain’
8. Flaps – ‘original packaging for Hash Nosh’
9. Knick Licka – ‘Kleptomaniac’ at our Social night.
10. Wheelie Bin + Fill de Jaw – ‘Ernest Hemingway’ Award for their run report
11. Tarzan – ‘Thanks Bro Award’ for his contribution to the containers for change recycling programme. 

Almost forgot a down down for returning runner ‘Cummalott’ great to see her present at the AGPU! GM then presented to the Mackay Bowls Club with our trophy for their mantel. 

On On 
Teflon 

Photos from the evening below:- 

     

   

        

      

     

    

       

 

Run Date: 14th October 2019
Run No #2041
Hare: Viagra
Venue: Blacks Beach Park 72 Bourke Street 
Hashers: 24

 

On On 

Wheelie Bin & Fill de Jaw 

Run Date: 7th October 2019
Run No #2040
Hare: Delicious & Fork
Venue: 80A Maple Drive Andergrove 
Hashers: 15

15 dedicated hashers turned up at fork and delicious’s run from 80a Maple Drive. There were 3 runs, short, medium and long. Everyone took the short run which was along Maple drive into Peaty street, down to Tropical avenue and on to at delicious’s place for the piss stop and a lovely brew it was too. From there the pack broke in to two with half continuing down tropical avenue to Fernleigh Avenue, then into Maple Drive and on home to Fork and Screw’s. The other half went back on tropical avenue to  peaty street right into Maple drive and on home.

A lot of bs was bandied about before the circle was called by the Monk, Tarzan, as usual it was a very orderly circle, down downs were given to the Hares, Fork and Delicious, as it was a queens birthday run hats were allowed in the circle, Pensioner with his crown larger cap, fork with here lady in waiting hat and flaps with a  beautiful diamond encrusted tiara. Tarzan was given a down down for leaving his tiara on the kitchen table and was awarded the dunce hat. He finished his down down but forgot the hat and the excess beer ended up all over the floor. Jokes were told, song was sung and it was on to traditional British fare, bangers, mash and peas followed by blue (green under the yellow light but I still think it was green even without the light), and vanilla ice-cream. More lies were told and then it was on home.

Next weeks run is at Blacks Beach park, set by Viagra.

On on until then. flaps

  

  

Run Date: 30^th September, 2019
Run No #2039
Hare: Fill De Jaw, Wheelie Bin & Hot Salami
Venue: 32 Spinnaker Way, Royal Sands, Bucasia
Hashers: 24

 

We all arrived like a swarm of bees to a honey pot, with the hope of some exquisite French Cuisine, to find Hot Salami out walking the dogs, and Fill De Jaw directing traffic to appropriate parking spaces (didn’t want to piss off the neighbours)!!!!  Wheelie Bin was up and about knocking over my Cider bottles again, Yep, I reckon that is about a 6 Pack now.

Around 6pm Fill De Jaw called everyone out the front to explain the markings, which was very hard to do without a Hash Horn to bring some order to the crowd, where are our Hash Horns?

On Trail                       Check                    On Back ?  

 

Our Hare ran out of chalk for the On Back, and it was too far to come home on the skateboard.

 

The On On was called, with Golly already halfway up the road and everyone followed after him.  From all accounts the trail was not shitty, but Blo Jo laid claim to being the only one who completed the run, with everyone else being a short cutting bastard.  This earned her a down down in the circle, as we didn’t have enough piss to charge all the SCB’s.

 

Cucumber and Carrot sticks were put out for nibbles, but after seeing everyone’s look of dismay, dips and chips were added while we waited for the circle to be called.  Without our Monk Tarzan, Streaker bequeathed this momentous job to yours truly.  Mango called the circle, and Pensioner copped one straight up, for muttering about women running the circle.

 

Jokes were told by Flaps, Golly and Blurry – hardly a joke Blurr, you must have lost your touch.

Charge for Flaps for losing his fridge out the side of his blue ute and taking off the entire side panel as he drove in his carport.  In his defence, he reportedly picked up a Swedish Backpacker that wanted to have her way with him, and that’s how the damage occurred.  HHHmmmm

No Birthdays to celebrate, Executive Lunch was decided on at Taylors Hotel, Virgin Hasher Elena from Italy – visiting the Hare, took a down down.  Streaker tried to charge Raggedy Ann for taking 2 hours to go from Canelands to Harrup Park, but the charge was squashed as it had nothing to do with Hash.  Apologies for anything I missed, as I was meant to be taking notes in the circle. With nothing further to discuss, the Mackay Hash Song was sung and the circle closed.

 

 Hash Nosh was not Escargot or Coq au Vin, but very nice corned meat and 2 large potato bakes with fresh bread and butter, and a huge array of sauces to tantalise the taste buds.

 

After Nosh, we all sat around yacking on, until the first few left, then the hash piss was away, so we collected up our empties and the rest of us buggered off home.

 

Hope to see you all next week on Monday 7^th October for Run #2040 at Fork & Screw’s abode, 80A Maple Drive, Andergrove to celebrate the Queen’s Birthday Long Weekend.

 

To commemorate this significant occasion, you are formally requested to wear a Crown, Tiara, Court Jester Hat or any other kind of headwear you feel appropriate.  Our most honourable Monk Tarzan will be charging anyone not wearing something on their head in the circle.

 

 

           

On On

Delicious – Mackay H3 Hash Whip