Date – 17 November, 2025
Run – 2355
Hare – Piccolo
Venue – 82 Grendon St North Mackay
Hashers: + or – 18

About 18, or 20 or 16 Hashers rolled up to the abode of Piccolo in deepest dark North Mackee, to find her proudly showing off her brand new front staircase. Very nice, but how about one for the rear? Upon wandering down the drive we discovered that a rustheap, previously identified as a Jeep, had been moved to allow yet another seething pile of metal, previously identified as a Camaro, to slip in uninvited, even though it was hidden under several tarps, previously identified as carpet. We was still peeking under said carpet, when the host Piccolo Pirata, called us to the roadside and announced she was a live hare. Setting off at an incredibly fast dawdle the mob toured the surrounding area before ending back at the start, where beer n nibbles awaited.

General bullshit was flung about with a giggle here n there, until the Monk, returning from being absent called the mob to attention for the circle. Unfortunately reverting to previous form he proceeded to bore us with an incredibly long and rambling diatribe on the wonders of…… sorry, brain switched off. Moving right along it was a call for charges that produced a sea of blank faces, until Golly threw a charge at Zorro, for being Zorro. Golly then received a payback down down for his incredible attempt at reversing the Hash Piss car. The hare received her just deserts, also some returning strollers, whom I can’t recall, followed by a call for jokes which produced another sea of blank faces. Eventually some old clangers were re-hashed. The song was sung and we sat down among much groaning from the ageing horde. Piccolo disappeared, and returned with a big pot of chicken soup/stew/stuff and lotsa bread. Better note here that Knicker was banned from pot carrying duty. The mob began slurping and burping.

Much more yackety yack, and the mob slowly dispersed into the night, leaving Piccolo to clean up.
Another successful Hash night. 

Next week it’s Shocker’s turn. He would have written this report if he’d turned up, so it got left to me to scribe whatever I could remember.

OnOn Pensioner.

Run Date: 10^th November 
Run No: 2354
Hare: Daffodil 
Venue: Quota Park, Far Beach 
Hashers: 13

A few lost Hashers turned out for a magical evening close to the beach for run 2354. After Hash Cash handed out winnings to some lucky bastards it was on around the streets of East Mackay in the ever-lengthening light of Spring twilight only to return to Quota Park.

A small circle was formed and charges laid. Very few jokes were told and then Tarzan persisted with trying to form a Hash Choir to sing a new song. Circle closed after decision made to go to Hog’s Breath for monthly dinner on 29/11/25.

Some possums joined us for an amazing feed of chicken curry followed by yummy choc bickies. Hash Cash will hold onto winning sweeps monies for those Hashers that weren’t there until they turn up or their proxy asks for it.

Next run at Piccolo’s place. On On, Mrs Apeel.

Date – 3 November, 2025 
Run – 2353
Hare – Raggedy Ann and Golly
Venue – 3 Trochus Ct, Shoal Point
Hashers: 13

13 keen Hashers rolled up at Golly and Raggedy’s abode, ready for a walk around Shoal Point. Numbers were down with the increasing number of traveling Mackay Hashers away at this time. Golly called us to the front of the house to give run instructions but were interrupted by Prick and Tarzan who continued in their private discussion, even after Daffodil sounded the horn several times, so Golly continued under his instructions. Along the road, through a walkway and onto the beach for a few hundred meters with our heads down into the strong wind, to steps which led us off the beach. We continued around Shoal Point with the near full moon and the lightning show towards the south, onto The Playground where Golly was waiting with a Piss Stop which was enjoyed by all and on home.

Nibbles were brought out and the stand in Monk, Tarzan called the circle to attention. The monk took his Down Down for a shit hot run, Charges: Prick and Tarzan for not listening to the hare, jokes were recycled and told by Tonguer, Pensioner. Tarzan, accompanied by Maple Syrup and Mrs. Appeal gave a gut busting rendition of Giovanni Masta Barni which bought the house down. 

 Hash Nosh was bought out, going healthy tonight, ham, chicken and salad, followed by chocolates. Another beer and it was On Home from the Northern Beaches to South of the Pioneer for Daffodil and Corgi. Another good night was had by all. On the way home at the Rural View roundabout, we encountered a fire truck with flashing lights, heading towards Bucasia / Shoal Point direction, didn’t see any fires. After the Golf Club turn off, we came across more flashing lights, this time it was the police directing traffic around a tilt tray truck , recovering a car from down the bank. Just past the first tilt tray there were two more tilt tray trucks on the side of the road, don’t know how many cars were over the bank. After going through Bunnings roundabout, more flashing lights, an ambulance this time. enough excitement for the night, we were glad to get home.

OnOn Daffodil and Corgi.

Next Week’s Run, Quota Park, Binnington Esplanade, East Mackay, Next to Ocean International Hotel.

Date – 27 October, 2025
Run – 2352
Hare – McFanny
Venue – 7 Devira Ct, Harbour
Hashers:  20 ish

We all started arriving at McFanny New Weee House where we
were greeted with Christmas lights,  “smile you’re on camera”. 

While we were trying to work out how to get to back yard either through house or jumping
fence the side door opened and there stood the Hare and guard dog.
 We followed her down the path witch seemed to go ON & ON & ON till
we came out the other side.  When the rest of the cult arrived we were taken
back down path to start. Hare addressed us
There is only One F–_ing road Out.
There is only One F—ing road In
It is marked in F—ing chalk.
And it goes that F—ing way.

On down the road towards surf club, on to round about where we sort of
lost our way.   Wandering around looking for marks till our lolly pop person
PRICK pointed us the way on.
Arriving back we were greeted with crackers &  home made dips which i must
say were yummy.

Circled called by stand in monk, choir masterTar Boy.   Charges Jokes And song.
Hash grub was up and what a spread was waiting for us around the island bench…
you guessed it, one way in-one way out.
McFanny was not finished yet.  On came the fire works!  Flares and smoke lit up the
sky and to top it off the Hare arranged mobile red & blue flashing lights.  well done
Hare!

We sat around drinking till the 5 variety Tim Tams came out.  Another 5 Star effort.

Good night had by all and it was great to see you still have it McFanny.
See you at GOLLY and RAGGEDY ANN’s run.

 GOLLY

 Date – 20 October, 2025
Run – 2351
Hare – Matches
Venue – 2 Glenwood Park, Andergrove
Hashers: 22

Was it hard to find?  Certainly I was lost but Golly found his way and so did 17 other Hashers, mostly on Google maps or because they’ve lived here all/most of their lives.

22 runners made it to the seclusion of Glenwood Park; beautiful property (oodles of storage), amazing home (guided tour), and undercover area (massive) I’m jealous of.  What a gorgeous venue to host run 2351.  

The run – up hill and down, around the neighbourhood with glimpses of Harbour and Slade Point, piss stop at McCready’s Creek boat ramp, return – was voted ‘shit hot’ by all.  The usual routine was dispensed with after Ocean facts, charges, jokes and updates.  A very shitty song was sung by Choir Master and choir support to wrap things up.

Nosh was all delicious including Matches’ pre-circle dips, corned beef spread and choc-topped ice-creams.

Another great night of Hash.  Thank-you Matches and Zorro.

Date – 13 October, 2025
Run – 2350
Hare – Hot Rocks
Venue – Mackay City Bowls Club
Hashers: 32???

Hashers out of the woodwork…30-32 past and present Hashers convened in anticipation of AGPU at the Mackay Bowls Club.  
I lie.  They convened in anticipation of FGAFF.
“I’m the live hare,” announced Hotty and he led us all (well 2/3s of us or so) on a merry chase to he and DT’s stomping grounds for some excellent Hash Piss.  Well lubricated Hashers hit the bar in droves on our quick return.  A rowdy circle was called and duely facilitated by our history-less Monk.  Many down-downs included a huge circle of returned runners, (not sure if they’ll be returning, but) and nearly twin birthday girls.  We’ve all definitely heard better jokes, but someone definitely appreciated Christian/Christine.

Nosh was announced and consumed with great camaraderie before the serious business of AGPU began.  It was a painless procedure due mostly to behind the scenes negotiations on the Goose Ponds last week.  More importantly, perhaps, the annual awards were proclaimed:

Short-cutting Bastard went to Zorro for his dash to the Cooroy at Run 2340.
Best Run was all Blurry’s for his memorable efforts at our Away/Celebration Run.
Worst Nosh was indisputably Prick’s prize.
Shortest run went to missing in action (get better soon) Fork.
Longest run was won by Juice who accepted her prize with this comment…”We’ve all become a bunch of Sooks”.
Best Nosh was all Flaps’s!
A new award, Most Exotic Executive Lunch Experience,  went to Golly (and we’ll never forget why.)
Finally, Most Runs went to Pench, despite his motorcycle adventuring.
To top off the night, the new committee was formally presented to the ragged cheers of pissed Hashers.  Congratulations to the new team! 

New Committee below

Run Date: 6 October 2025
Run No: 2349
Hare: Nicka Licka
Venue: Park behind Goosies, North Mackay
Hashers: 24

A merry band of enthusiastic worn out broken down hashers gathered at the shelter adjacent to the Goosies bowlo.

As the sun set, the throng of some 20 souls set off around the goose ponds. Not the 4 Beer hunters,  who were straight off to the bar at the bowling club. A distance of approx 300meters. Whilst there, we enjoyed beer and wine to our liking. 

After a suitable time, we returned to the venue only to find the hare didn’t pay the power bill so all was in darkness. Thank goodness for led lights. The pack arrived back with their little tongues hanging out, the piss stop was still in the hares 4WD.

A vast array of nibbles, homemade dips and chips were laid out. Our gorging soon ended as Smut called the circle to order.

Following our now mandatory history/fact lesson, the hare was given a sip of his piss stop brew. It was discovered that Nicker did a great job making the brew so Zorro gave all the Beer hunters a down down.

Returning runners Lassie, Tonto, Mango, Prick, JCF were charged as was a second charge for Mango for referring to a Harriet named Judy. I hear you ask what the fuks a Judy. There was a joke told by JCF that took out the Knothead award.

All good things come to an end; the Song was sung and circle coolosaid.

NICKER produced a feast that prompted seconds and his special recipe Brownies. We then sat around talking shit until the led lights dimmed whereupon we went home.

Next week’s run is the AGPU from the Mackay Bowls Club

On ON 

Out Going Committee 

Run Date: 29 September 2025
Run No: 2348
Hare: Smut
Venue: 20 Royal Boulevard, Glenella
Hashers: 21

About 20 Hashers assembled at Smuts  abode for what looked like being the first Dry run from this area for quite some time. After first dragging the hare out of the kitchen the group assembled out the front at 1808 to get their instructions for the wander around the neighbourhood of which nobody took the slightest bit of notice because Smut had the piss stop across his back and they just followed him. Some people will do anything to have a following. 

Don’t know what the run was like because I was forced to stay behind to guard the esky for the group which I did in the most excellent and efficient manner confirmed by the Hashers first action of checking their precious refreshments immediately on their return. Followed by a extended period contentment and conversation until the Monk called the circle.

Following the deluge of information dragged off the internet for those boring TV game shows we got down to the business of charging people for misdemeanours (smut, harbour, returning runner’s, virgin runner’s,  etal ) and then the Alzheimer’s Blurrie who could not remember why a castrated bull wears a bell, then the sad story from Insex about the virgin amputee learning his astronomical fate (by high tide) 

By  now a few of the crowd were getting restless so the song was sung and the seagulls circled waiting for the hash nosh to be served  After the initial swarm things settled down to the quietest time of the evening before the great Lemming exit 

Next week’s run will be from the BBQ area behind the Gooses bowls club

On on

Nicka

Run Date: 22 September 2025
Run No: 2347
Hare: Pensioner & Mango
Venue: John Breen Park, North Mackay
Hashers: 16 

The travel weary hare (Pensioner) ambushed arrivals at the carpark entrance to the John Breen Park and regaled unwary hashers with tales of his recent motorcycle pilgrimage through the US.

Following multiple repeats of the same story, the hare handed out six envelopes with run instructions, citing a dicky knee as his excuse for not setting a marked trail.

A welcome piss-stop laced with fully imported bootleg Jack Daniels whiskey was gladly consumed by runners before returning to the piss truck.

The circle was called and the hare was charged, not once, but multiple times – Mango had to gracefully decline consuming a charge as she had become the designated driver following Pensioner’s numerous indiscretions.

The song was sung and circle closed before participants hoed into lashings of sausages and onion on bread followed by tasty chocolate and / or coconut slice.

See you next week at 20 Royal Boulevard, Glenella.

On On 

Smut

Run No: 2346
Hare: Juice & Termite
Venue: 12 Barclays Rd, Dumbleton
Hashers: 16

The evening sun was setting as we headed out to a supposedly snake free sojourn across the Barclays Road meadows. It was downhill, then uphill then down n up and down again for a piss stop. We eventually went up n down in the reverse order to find the on home. 

Then it was up n down steps to get to the hash piss truck all nite. Talk about exercise!!. Our lovely Juice surprised us all with her salsa tacho mix on corn chips. Definitely got a keeper here Termite. As the last of the nibbles was devoured Tarzan called the circle to order.

The hares got their down downs as usual, Blurry received his birthday gift. Golly was immortalised for his cockroach sweet n sour pork at our last executive lunch. Several jokes and a few true stories saw the circle closssed.

Another excellent meal co-cooked by Termite was eagerly devoured by all followed by fresh Anzac bikkies for dessert. 

Everyone sat around solving the world’s problems for ages. Then one hasher left and everyone followed 

Next week is a Pensioner and Mango affair from John Breen park, see ys there.

On On

Snot