Date – 07.07.2025
Run – #2335
Hare – Pensioner or Mango
Venue – John Breen Park, North Mackay
Hashers: 16

Bunch of hashers fronted up at John Breen Park ready to take on “The Pensioner” run which he had set earlier in the day, as he has so much free time to do, only to be told it’s an envelope run. So off we all charged towards Mt P Tavern only to be misled onto Little Street. That’s where this story teller got way laid at Goosies. I believe the run was good but I really couldn’t comment on that. Back at the Park, there was a couple short cutting bastards and beer, nibbles came out and lots of bullshit spoken. Stand in Hare and GM called the circle and got us all in some sort of order only to give us some history lesson. Which was quite entertaining. Couple of true stories told as well as a couple bull shit stories but we enjoyed them anyway. Nicka got special mention for turning the big 80. How can this hasher be 80 after all the abuse he has done to himself being mates with Knothead and the amount of liquor from Uncle Dans over the years. Half the committee is away, chasing good looking camels out west for a good time or freezing their tits off. Not sure about that, but they sucked Animal and Kennel into joining them in their little strange adventure. Matches and myself visited Townsville H3 for their run at Killymoon for the weekend and what happens on tour, stays on tour “wink wink”, it was a great weekend and more Mackay Hashers should make the effort and support our neighbours Hash events. Next week’s run is from MF at the harbour. Bring your best fuck off repellent, as you will need it. Although, I will be burning some good chemical infused wood to ward off the bugs.

On On
Zorro 

Date – 30.06.2025
Run – 2334
Hare – Golly
Venue – 4 Trochus Court, Shoal Point
Hashers: 21 hashers

A bunch of 21 or so hashers trekked to the outer sandy reaches of Shoal Point to see what mischief Golly had set. And it started with his directions…. Left or right, right or left, everyone was suitably confused. Off the pack trudged, but my bung leg forced me to sit it out, so what happened on the run? Dunno, wasn’t there.
In due course the mob returned, and fell about the piss truck for cold beer, whilst sipping hot pumpkin soup with the other.

Eventually the monk did his usual fun facts spiel, before dishing out down downs for a variety of misdemeanours, of which I took no notice, forgetting that I had to write this memoir…. I do recall newcomer Bella, from Chicago, being rather amused at the antics of an Aussie hash club.

Charges and jokes out of the way, the song was warbled, and then Golly and Raggedy produced a feast including tasty rissoles, of which I had 12…. Or was it 11? Can’t recall.

Usual banter continued, until the mob began to wander off back to the burbs.

Next week, we have a new venue! John Breen Park. Hmm… sounds familiar, have we been there before?

See ya there, Pensch

Date – 23/06/2025
Run – 2333
Hare – Smut
Venue – 20 Royal Boulevard Glenella 
Hashers – 21

It was not a clear winters night the rain was about to descend on us again.

Some 21 hashers gathered under cover till 6 pm and we were herded up  on to the road.  Some 12 hashers with torches & umbrellas got our instructions. The trail was set but was washed out so it was a live hare run.

Off we set after the Hare who had the Drink for the Piss Stop. We walked around the streets of Glenella till we arrived at the Playground to be greeted with a mess of left-over food all over table.  We had the piss stop than headed home.

Nibbles brought out, rain stopped, circle called then the Bullshit started. Then charges. Hare Monkey charged all the wimps for not coming out in the rain – 12 or so.  Zorro for being Zorro, Returning runners Corgie & Daffodil.  Jokes & stories were told – some true some false.  Song sung circle closed.

Food brought out very good – none left over for Smuts lunch. Dessert.  More Bullshit.  All the Bad beer ran out but i had plenty of the good stuff left XXXX,

We all drifted off home ready for next run see you at 4 Trochus Ct allow a little more time as traffic can be slow that time of day.

  ON-ON  GOLLY

Date – 16/06/2025
Run – 2332
Hare – Shocker
Venue – Starting at Settlers Rise Park
& then on to Shocker’s abode at 4/23 Sunset Dve, Erakala
Hashers –

 Heavy overcast conditions greeted a strong turnout of runners at the Settlers Rise Sturt Street playground.  Once comfortable all willing participants had arrived, Shocker directed the gathering to a little show-and-tell, which outlined the bulk of the commonly used Hash run marks.  This little lesson was gladly received by some of the less experienced hashers and no doubt, reminded some of the old stalwarts of some trail-setting protocols.

Once underway, runners found a well-marked trail, meandering through the limited number of streets in Settlers rise. The run was punctuated by a piss-stop at the other Settlers Rise playground.  On-home to Sturt Street playground, before hashers made their way up and down the big hill to Shockers residence. U-turn was spooked by the terrain and elected to park in the next suburb – well, that’s what felt like for Tarboy.

With the circle opened, there was a spirited charge session – Gravel Rash had a lot to say, Tounger took a returning runner down-down plus there were no less than three Hashy Birthdays. Also, virgin runner Just Ben “introduced” himself.

A surprisingly humorous joke session, with Golly, Flaps and Insex leading the charge.

With the Club song sung and circle closed, Shocker wrestled lashings of pork meat off the open fire spit-roast.  This formed the base for very tasty roast pork and salad rolls.

Keen fellowship followed dinner before departing hashers started preparing themselves for the steep haul up to their cars.

Next week’s run is at 20 Royal Boulevard, Glenella.

On On

Smut

Date – 9/06/2025
Run – 2331
Venue: Jaycee Park Bedford Rd Beaconsfield 
Hare – Screw & Fork
Hashers – 24

 A bunch of chilly Hash Runners gathered at Jaycee Park in Andergrove, Plenty of returning runners and some virgin runners so a really good turnout. Returning runners included Prick, Knothead & PawPaw.  There was a live Hare and Instructions were given to “stay behind the Hare at ALL times!!” Off we all went on a leisurely run (walk) over into the Dark and gloomy mozzy ridden depths of Andergrove. Lucky it was too cold for mozzies and everyone had a torch. We continued on down the inner sewers behind Tropical Avenue where Mrs Appeel narrowly missed falling into a sinkhole beside the drain. Surprise!!! There was a Piss stop at Delicous’ place with a Hashy Birthday for Distillery and a Returning runner song for Deeeliiisooous. It was on home back to the park for a very yummy warm cob loaf which all the cold hungry Hashers devoured. Plenty of chit chat and the circle was called. No history lesson from the Monk this week just some very interesting facts about women being lighter than men. Saving Goa Airway millions of dollars a year.   Charges for Screw the hare, Zorro, Matches, Raggedy Ann, Mrs Appeel, PawPaw – Mrs Appeel and PawPaw again and all the returning runners. Some Cracker Jokes and a very quick speil from the Virgin runners, Just Peter & Just Janine. Circle closed off with the normal formalities and then it was into the lovely Hash nosh of Beef Raggoo from Fork. Some Chockies to close out the great night then it was on Home. See everyone next week.

Shocker  

Date – 2/06/2025
Run – 2330
Venue: 82 Grendon St North Mackay
Hare – Piccolo
Hashers – 18

 
18 enthusiastic hashers turned up at Piccolo’s humble abode, feeling refreshed after a quiet weekend.With live hare Piccolo setting a gentle pace, there were a few non-starters, a few SCB’s and a couple late arrivals.

The reduced pack walked the streets of nth Mackay then meandered back to the esky.

Snacks were had, beers consumed and jokes practiced.

Circle was called and down downs dished  out; jokes were successfully told.  A warm welcome to Mouthful and 457 from Darwin, with an obligatory down down.  Song was sung and circle closed .

Nosh was served (tasty) more booze drunk and BS talked.  When esky run dry we all toddled of home.

Next weeks run is from Jaycee Park, Bedford Road, Andergrove

On On

Date – 26/05/2025
Run – 2329
Hare – Harbour & Mrs Appeel
Venue: Camilleri Street PARK Dolphin Heads Hashers – 18, 19 or maybe 20????

Nearly 20 hashers attended this run set by Harbour at Camilleri Park, Northern Beaches

Unlike the last time we were here the weather was perfect, so different to the other run being the hottest night in  MH3 unrecorded history. 

The hare assembled the peloton mentioning hills, piss stop and views.  They were off and after a while the hills intimidated several runners who returned to the beer.  Then as promised a piss stop was found. Then the tragic incident happened, the hare got lost on his own trail. I will repeat that THE HARE  GOT LOST ON HIS OWN TRAIL.  After aimlessly wandering around in the direction of the park a trail was located and the pack wandered on in for the circle. 

Fines:-

• Co hare Mrs Appeel was having nothing to do with the run and left Harbour to sink the down downs on his own. 
• Snot and Gravel Rash for something frivolous 
• Blurry as a returning runner
• Zorro for being Zorro and he always needs a drink
• Golly for pretty much the same reason

Circle closed.

A lovely meal was eagerly consumed by the ravenous hordes, Thanks Mrs Appeel.

After a while the bullshit cleared and it was home for the stand-in scribe

On On

Next week it is Piccolo’s turn to entertain us at 82 Grendon Street

Date – 19/05/2025
Run – 2328
Venue: 66 O’Brien Esplanade, Shoal Point
Hare –Maple Syrup
Hashers – 19

 To the sands of the Northern beaches, our intrepid bunch of Hashers ventured.

A couple of ring-ins joined our motley crew for a saunter around the hills of Shoal Point with a piss stop at the park on the beach.

A couple of hashers ( Tarzan & Fork) got lost in the park (wrong park) and were picked up by some of us on the way back.

History lesson given and then charges laid.

Maple Syrup received a charge for over-achieving both in her report AND setting the run.

Jokes told and circle closed.

A very enjoyable meal in front of a warming fire with lots of great chatter.

Camilleri Street Park for the next run and should definitely be cooler than the last run there.

ON, On,

Mrs Appeel

Date – 12/05/2025
Run – 2327
Venue: Park beside the Surf Club at the Harbour
Hare – Rarebit & Titanic
Hashers – 17 (or was that 18)

It was a night to remember well,
Huddled under the Surf Club deck
The wind was whipping up quite a swell
How do I know…some of us checked!

Luckily tables were moveable and light,
Handy towels soaked up the wet.
The run began and all were right
Until the beach was clearly set.

A few brave souls fought on through
To the piss stop arriving in Titanic’s car
It was delicious, cold and refreshing too.
Badly needed as ‘On Home’ felt far!

Circle began as the rain started up,
History lesson as usual, charges and jokes,
Titanic and Rarebit served up the sup,
Rain drove us away, so long folks.

Many thanks to our hares, a memorable night,
Next run will be staged in Shoal Point.
Come down Volute and then turn right
You won’t be able to miss my joint!

Maple Syrup

Date – 03/05/2025
Run – 2326
Venue – 19 Tern Street Slade Point 
Hare – Snot and Insex
Hashers – 21

I have been requested by Rarebutt to compile a precise of the run following his unfortunate migraine.  Luckily, I knew the venue, run and participants very well and am uniquely qualified to give an accurate critique. 

Our beloved Sir Snott picked up the golden telephone and requested that the rain and wind gods desist with the bloody rain for at least 24 hours and give him a chance to set a perfect run.  The scene was now set and no one was left to wonder what a perfect run was ahead. A departure from tradition was that the piss stop was at the commencement some 50 meters from the start on a headland overlooking the calm ocean and being high tide the water as at our feet. BEERHUNTERS HHH were deliriously happy with this innovation. 

The superbly marked trail, quite possibly the best marked in MH3 history, made possible by the rain god washing the road/footpath with 1 wheelbarrow full of rain the previous day. Sir Snotts newly constructed auto maker (patent pending) performed faultlessly as the trail wound its way passed numerous heritage sites and even offered a selection of used household furniture. Courtesy of tenants very likely absconding without paying rent and the bailiff removing all items to give the poor fukin landlord his destroyed home back. But I digress, after more superbly marked trail, all flat, and 2103 meters later all arrived home.

Here all got into the beer, wine and cider had a few nibbles. Our illustrious monk called circle up then gave us a sermon he had prepared for the previous week but he went awol instead so we got it tonight. The hares were then called to account for the run. Apparently a 10/10 score is pretty rare but I must accept credit as I earned it. There was a few other fines a few jokes told whilst the Monk again disappeared but returned dressed in all his regalia. Just Sandy and Just Otto were summoned, after being forced to kneel before almighty Monk he bestowed upon them their names and they shall henceforth be known as Gravel Rash and OMG ( oh my god) from this day forth.  

Flaps celebrated the day of his birth and consider himself very lucky I didn’t make a cake on his head, even had the ingredients ready. 

Then INSEX served dinner consisting marinated chicken infused with Chardy, 15 herbs and spices ala dente pasta laced with thickened cream.

Sir Snott then brought out desert Passionfruit jelly cheesecake and left over jelly in the Passionfruit shells

Circle closed and song sung.

ON ON

SIR SNOTT