Run Date: 11^th September, 2017
Run No #1928
Hare: Blurry & Blo Jo
Venue:   Cnr Peel & Alfred Street. The Bright Side
Hashers: 24

 

Hash Trash Run # 1928…. Blurry’s, 349 Peel Street Darkside.

 

A merry band of Hashers, about 24 or so, met at the abode of the infamous Blur, and stood around talking the usual garbage, until The Blur himself invited us to the front lawn, whereupon he espoused the wonders of the trail he had set through the streets of Mackay’s CBD. There was prattle about left chalk and right chalk, you’re gunna luv it, there’s a piss-stop ad- nauseum.  The fact he managed to set a run at all after falling of a ladder and cracking some ribs on a flower-pot had us all believing this would be a minimalist effort. And we was right. A stroll along Alfred St took us almost to Taylor’s pub, before veering off away from the beer. A few twists and turns and found ourselves in the vicinity of the Palace pub. Zorro couldn’t resist, and in he went, only to be accosted by rival footy players who demanded he pay a ransom in beer.
The rest soldiered on, onto the Bluewater Trail along the riverbank. A further turn or three found us in the proximity of the Austral pub, which, surprise surprise, seemed to have a pack of SCB’s who hadn’t followed any trail at all. No names…  Smeg, Hotty, Golly etc…. oh, and there’s Blurry. Luckily a few jugs of suds helped wash away the dust of the trail, before we wandered off back to the Hash piss. But not before being accosted by a Tina Turner look-alike, who turned out to be Zorro’s son at a footy Mad-Monday. Pity Zorro was still at the wrong pub!

Back at the On After, a tray of  bread with bacon n egg, and some nuts kept us amused, until the Monk called us all to order. Hotrocks was quickly quietened with a down down for talking in the circle.  The usual round of down downs followed… for the hare and his assistant BloJo. Lassy scored a double down down, for getting a job, and for having a birthday. The hare scored another for also having a birthday. Zorro was called upon to explain his very unusual offspring. Smeg because he wanted free piss. Tonguer pulled out a sheet of jokes, which would have put Knothead to shame if he was there! Round about here I start to lose my memory, so any further charges and jokes all become a Blur. Touche!

Circle closed after a rendition of the club song, and the troops fell into gossipy bullshit.

Out came a curry concoction with rice, which went down a treat, but caused excessive farting next day. The beer supplies dwindled to a critical low, so we all pissed off!

See y’all in Rural View next week.
Pensioner.

Run Date: 4^th September, 2017
Run No #1927
Hare: Who Hasn’t Paid & Breast Stroke
Venue:   16 Lochmaben Court, Beaconsfield
Hashers: ?

 

 

A good crowd of approximately 20 hashers turned up after the annual away run weekend at Finch Hatton, looking for some exercise to get rid of the stomach bulge from too much food and grog over the weekend.

The run was explained by HWP, which sounded exactly like the description of the Finch Hatton run, and away we went. Good to see some runners heading out to the front for a change, being followed up by the walkers. Around the streets we went, across the paddock and past the sewerage pump…..MMMMMM.

Congratulations to all the runners and Wombat for doing the whole run, and eventually all the pack dribbled back to the ON ON. A good run and well marked.

First a beer, then out came a warm dip with corn chips by way of Flaps. So tasty and addictive, that I could not stop eating it.

The circle was called, and the Hares given their down downs, followed by other  charges for Blurry, Pensioner, Golly, Blurry, Zorro and the rest I forget.

Pensioner received another drink and award for achieving 150 runs, and Blurry a drink for achieving Clickity Click.

Jokes were told, lies were spread, and the usual B.S. flowed. A big thank you to all who made the away run the success that it was, then the Mackay song was sung (correctly) and the circle closed.

Out came the Nosh, and what a good feed it was too. Leftovers from roast dinner on Sat night, along with desert. HUGE…

That done, all that was left to do was try to drink the esky dry.

A good night was enjoyed and off we all went to our beds.

Next week’s run (The Down Town Dash) will be from Blurries place, on the Cnr. of Peel and Alfred St.

C….U…All there.

Blurry.

 

2nd – 3rd September 2017 
Finch Hatton Showgrounds

Run Date: 28^th August, 2017
Run No #1925
Hare: Drip Tray
Venue:   19 Clive Court, Kerrisdale Estate
Hashers: 27
Nosh: Sausage Rolls, Lasagne, Liver & Bacon, Mashed Potatoes, Scones with Jam & Cream

               

NO RUN REPORT THIS WEEK                               

Run Date: 21^st August, 2017
Run No #1924
Hare: Radish & Paw Paw
Venue:   Riverside Drive, Cremorne
Hashers: 26  

 

About 25 of us set off from the banks of the Pioneer River in Cremorne. Through the cane fields we walked with the local hash horn and visiting horn in competition. There was plenty of barking and howling from the dogs and no one including Lassie got lost! Past the mater hospital then back down along the river bank to our spot where we all enjoyed a cold beverage and some snacks.

 

Down downs for our visiting Hash members and virgin runners Jenny and Mark (the fam bam up for holidays.)  Mark was so impressed he thinks it’s worth flying up from Brisbane every Monday. Circle jokes weren’t too bad as Knothead was at work!

 

Zorro brought our fire pit again and it was greatly appreciated in the cool weather. Especially by Piccolo, no meat on them legs to keep her warm. 

 

All in all a good run and great food Pawpaw.

 

See you all at 19 Clive Crt Kerrisdale next week.

 

On on DT

Run Date: 14^th August, 2017
Run No #1923
Hare: Daffodil & Corgi
Venue:   Ooralea Park, Temples Lane, Bakers Creek
Hashers: 22    

 

 Good trail, no bitumen.

 Good venue, minimal bugs.

 Good roll up, no surprises.

 Good nosh, very tasty.

 Good fire, no blazes.

 Goodbye.

 Radish. OnOn.

 

 

 

 

 

Run Date: 7^th August, 2017
Run No #1922
Hare: Flaps
Venue:   17 Jarrah Street, Beaconsfield
Hashers: 28    

 

It was a warmer night from the big rainfall event of 2 mls. Flaps called everyone to the front and explained the run he had set on flour and that there was a piss stop. Did we believe him yes of course. We all headed off down the street to the check on the corner. Hotty and Golly checked right and the rest of us went left to the next check. Zorro and myself checked further up the street to find an on back. By this time Hotty, Golly and us joined the rear of the pack. All were keeping up a swift walk to find the trail almost to the Golf Club but turned past Beaconsfield School and met Flaps at  his piss stop of Lemon Lime and Bitters at the front of the Pioneer School. We found out later Hotty missed the turn along the drain and went further. We turned left into suburbia across the park and on home.

A well marked run and a good length but Hooker thought it was a little long for her for she asked Flaps for a lift home at the piss stop.

Paw Paw and Delicious were keeping the home fire burning but it was there but not lit. Flaps had dips and chips ready and then followed with hot Potato and Leek soup and fresh bread rolls. Flaps called the circle and received his down down for the run. JCF called for jokes and charges. Golly received a down down for forgetting the Banner and a Hashy Birthday was sung for Hooker and Tarzans birthdays on the 4^th and 9^th and to my suprise my 1350 run milestone was rewarded and Blurry for his 1100 run. A late Birthday song for Teflon was remembered and talking in the circle charge for Daffodil and Hotty.

More jokes were told and charges and then the Hash song was sung. Flaps brought out Chicken Masala , Meatballs and pasta. Very filling and tasty.

Next weeks run will be from Ooralea Waters Picnic Park. Turn right at the lights at Bakers creek into Temples lane, continue through the round about, take the next  left turn.

On on

Corgie

 

 

Run Date: 31^st July, 2017
Run No #1921
Hare: Knicker Licker
Venue:   Northview Park, Cnr Shapers Road & Royal Boulevard, Glenella
Hashers: 24    

 

It was a bit chilly when the pack set off from the Royal Boulevard park. A run set by serial run setter Knicka Licka. It was then off  down Schapers road and then buggered if I knew were it went after that. I don’t do runs unless they at least 5 kilometres long.

The run was well marked as Lassie didn’t get lost. The first back were the two fittest runners in Mackay Hash, JCF and Prick, who found Knicka’s keys and with the help of the next fittest runner Zorro proceeded to raid the piss truck.

The rest of the pack slowly made their way back in across the park torches ablaze.

The hare was called up and had his just desserts some sort of song was then sung. Streaker was charged for making Flaps spend his hard earned pension on a taxi, when the bus trip would have done the job cheaper.

Jokes were told, more lies spread. Blurry and Blo Jo had a down down as returning runners, it’s good to see them back at it, although Blurry had a bit of trouble only having the use of one arm. Blo Jo had to take him to the toilet as he had trouble with the undoing of his shorts. (I made that up but don’t let the truth get in the way of a good story).

The song was sung, the start of the second verse through everyone out as it usually does. Food was consumed a chicken stew which was very tasty and bread, followed by homemade apple pie made in Sarah Lee’s home and custard, again all very tasty.

A photo was taken of the Airlie Beach banner with all the hashers in front of it (except for Lassie, who hid under it). Unfortunately someone stole the banner we went to a lot of trouble to steal, please get it back to Golly asap as he is taking it up to Airlie next weekend.

Next weeks run will be from Flaps’ place, the food will be sausages, bread and tomato sauce, without the sausages and bread but plenty of tomato sauce you just have to bring a spoon.

on on a secret run reporter who isn’t Flaps.

 

Run Date: 24^th July, 2017
Run No #1920
Hare: Prick & Lassie
Venue: Goose Ponds
Hashers: 18    

The usual Monday Hash saunter into the venue  occurred from around (what time did you get there DT ?) till just after 6.00 when the last minute flurry of activity started.  Is Tounger here yet, shit I need my torch, better get the horn,  where’s the hare, I’ve  got to have a piss first, is the eskey open, Where the bloody hell is the hare I’m bloody getting thirsty.

Finally Prick steps up to the plate and starts to waffle on about something, till some energetic fool found the trail so the rest of us finally got up the courage to slowly saunter away from the booze. Let me tell U, for some it’s getting harder and harder on these cold dark nights to leave the safety of the Eskey’s .  Not me of course.

The usual procedure followed with people wandering around the streets and ponds finding and loosing the trail, taking short cuts, and pretending that we are exercising, or working up a greater thirst.  Although there was one earth shattering event that occurred, I noticed that Lassie took two false trails then rejoined the pack without getting lost once. Yeh Go Lassie.

Back at the On on the swilling and nibble picking was in full swing when that bloody loud  JCF, supported by the equally booming Flaps, rudely interrupted the festivities so that they could crap on and pretend that they had some sort of authority.  They then proceeded to pick on “the poor little Prick and demure Lassie”, fuck I nearly choked on that , for setting a shitty run.  No shitty run song for them I noticed. A  few jokes and Down downs followed, and all looked like another Ho Hum circle until along come Zorro.

This man should be congratulated !  For weeks now JCF  has been pouncing on poor unsuspecting  hashers and demanding that they tell a joke. When they couldn’t, forcing them to have a Down down.  But Zorro fucked that up, not only did he have a joke but a good one. Net result “we will sing the song now  Circle closed”.  Shortest circle we have had in ages.

The nosh was produced and then the sea gulls descended. The smart ones held back until the pushing and shoving and squawking had abated before they quietly  approached the food.  A first I thought it was strange behaviour but then I realised that it was Lassie who did the catering , not Prick. I know the food was good because Piccolo went back for seconds.  How do I know she had seconds, because at the end of the night when everyone up and left there was only two of us left me packing up and Piccolo finishing off her food.

Does anyone have a stopwatch I think I should time how long it takes her to eat her food. I think it could be a gold medal for Australia at the next Olympics      Haha     On that note

See ya next week

Nicka Licka

Run Date: 17^th July, 2017
Run No #1919
Hare: Tarzan
Venue: 4 Evans Avenue, North Mackay
Hashers: 24    

 

Hello fellow hashers,

A cheery bunch of 24 hashers arrived at Tarzan’s place of residence on this chilly night of July.  Tarzan explained the run being set in very old gyprock and how long it lasts, also to watch out for a wall that wasn’t marked and the most important information do not get lost tonight or I would miss the piss stop.

Finding very large arrows to follow we soon turned off footpath tramping over a fallen fence which I found a protruding nail, but no artery was penetrated so I continued the search for the piss.  Coming to a check with Hot rocks and JCF checking in different directions, I started another way when Hotty directed me across the road.  Finding another arrow I called ON ON to the other runners which Hot Rocks was disgusted in and disappeared from site.  Continuing on my own, there were plenty of barking dogs upset with our presence but I was not expecting the massive angry growling dog to come out from the yard wanting a bit of my leg.  Knowing there were runners behind me and piss in front of me I stood my ground. What seemed like a life time, JCF and Screw turned up and rescued me from the jaws of terror.  Down some more roads where we turned onto the side of a hill were at the end we come to said wall so I was told, by this time I had fallen behind the main group and everyone seemed to be moving very slowly there’s piss to be found people, get out of my way.  Following trail to John Breen Park the piss stop was found and a lovely drop it was, and with our thirst quenched we headed on home.

The circle was called Hare was charged as he should, Flaps was charged by Pensioner for losing his hat, which he reversed cause apparently he didn’t lose it it was stolen which I thought was the same thing. Pensioner refuses the reverse charge as he wasn’t the thief just the returner, the stand off was over when JCF took the down down for being the real hat thief.  I charged Tarzan for the hazards I endured on the run and then was charged myself by Streaker for walking too fast, but I was being chased by dogs and looking for alcohol so I had reason to walk fast.  JCF was charged for his upcoming half century.  The usual bad jokes were told song was sung circle closed.

Hot Dogs were served and devoured and we departed shortly after,

ON ON Lassie.