Run Date: 21st September 2020
Run No #2081
Hare: Teflon
Venue: 2 Geoffrey Thomas Drive Bucasia
Hashers: 20

20 intrepid hashers gathered at Teflon’s abode in deepest Bucasia, including Fil-de-Jour, showing off new baby Noah, who decided to ignore said hashers and sleep through the preliminaries.
Gathering at the front, Teflon handed out envelopes with instructions on how to find the non-trail. And off we went, accompanied by 3 dogs, who immediately stirred up the other 300 dogs in the vicinity. At the first checkpoint, envelope #2 was opened, with a vast array of non-information about where to go next. At this point Flaps, Tonguer and myself decided it would be prudent to turn around, and look after the beer. Which we did.  Eventually, the gang returned, slightly breathless, and flopped about in various chairs.
Nibblies appeared, bikkies n dip, and a bowl of green stuff that looked ridiculously too healthy for the mob….. Cash collected, it was time to call the circle. But…. The Monk was missing. As was the stand-in Golly. Double stand-in Zorro was called into action, whilst returning Monkee Mango busily filled cups with left-over piss-stop stuff. A down-down for the hare followed, along with a down-down for hash triplets Raggedy, Piccolo and McFanny in the same shirts.

  

 

Virgin runner Marilyn was called forward to reveal her life story in 3 seconds. And some jokes were told courtesy Flaps, Tonguer, Zorro, along with another Flavio/Gionvanni appearance. Tonguer also got a free drink, can’t remember why, also Delicious for taking over from Zorro. A few announcements were made about nothing, then Delicious coaxed Marilyn into drawing the seafood raffle, which was very unfairly won by Flaps. A rendition of the club song ended proceedings, and Teflon disappeared into the kitchen to return with steaming pots of thick pea n ham soup with fresh bread. Very tasty!
General banter carried on until Hash-Piss called last drinks, and the troops started to wander off into the night.

All-in-all another great night.

See you next week at The White House On The Hill.

Pensioner.

Run Date: 14th September 2020
Run No #2080
Hare: Delicious (with a little help from Distillery) 
Venue: 117 Tropical Ave Andergrove
Hashers: 21

 

As we pulled up at 117 Tropical Ave and made our way through the side gate, some of us questioned were we at the right house! Hard to recognize the place as Distillery had done a ‘little’ pruning!

Plonking ourselves down on the back area where we set our chairs up for an evening of Hash… Never knowing quite what the evening will bring. Just to break the ice for the Virgin Runners and welcome them into the ‘World of Hash’, JCF arrived with the ‘Prick of the Week’ strung around his waist displayed in all its glory with its RAAG safety bands securely attached. RAAG Road Accident Action Group – that ‘Prick’ was looking for a bit of action and was poking it here there and everywhere. Raggedy copped it in the face until she stood up to it!

No horn sounded as there was no horn but Delicious was able to give instructions out the front. A 35-minute walk AND a piss stop, what more could us aging, complaining baby boomers want. Heading right we meandered off into the evening catching up on the week’s events with one another & disturbing the dogs in the neighbourhood. Piss Stop at a park ‘yummy whatever’ that Delicious so ‘Covid friendly’ scooped out for us. Off meandering (we couldn’t even call it walking really) again. Some made it back through the front door and some through the back gate. I think the back gate was the correct one! That’s the way that Wheelie came through so it must have been right.

Circle called, charges laid, jokes by JCF, Pensch with his famous Italian accent joke and Flaps who was looking for Jesus. The 2 new virgin runners Suz & Phill hadn’t disappeared so we welcomed them with a down down. (Suz is Distillery’s sister) 

Potatoes first up to hit the spot after such an arduous walk! Hot dogs (without skin) as Delicious cannot do the red bits …served with salads. Who doesn’t love a Hot Dog? On a Monday night?

To top the night off the odd couple excitedly made their appearance, Dusty Girl and Roy Boy after being in confinement for the evening! Pats all round as they hoovered up any crumbs on the patio. 

Another night of Hash Fun…nothing quite like it! 

 

On On to Teflon’s next week.

 

Run Date: 7th September 2020
Run No #2079
Hare: McFanny
Venue: Wee hoose, 13 Grasstrail Street, Andergrove
Hashers: 20

20 enthusiastic hashers were tested to the extreme just to find a car park anywhere near the
Wee Hoose owned by McFanny. Most had already completed a mini marathon prior to setting
off on the arduous trail. Except perhaps for Paw Paw and Fork, who only made it across the road
for a beer or two, with Flaps making it around the block. From all accounts, no-one owned up to
completing the entire run, and resulted in the rendition of “S. H. I. T. T. Y. TRAIL”…….

Home-made potato wedges with cheese, bacon and onion dip was produced for Nibbles and a
welcoming fire was lit on everyone’s return. Acting Hash Cash collected the money, because
Pensioner was laying down with Mango somewhere and could not make it!!! Then she was
thanked for her efforts by McTavish (wee dog from wee hoose) in his own way for assuming an
intruder, the bleeding only lasted a while.

Circle was called by our honourable Monk Tarzan, who wanted to know what everyone was doing
in 1979, well not many Hashers can remember what they did last week, never mind last century…
He mumbled something about Smashing Pumpkins, then seemed to lose his train of thought.
McFanny refused to skull her very nice Sav Blanc’ as the Hare, even though it was reduced from
$20.00 to $10.00 a bottle. But then came up with a Pin for Hash Whip that said So,
Tar Boy revelled in the fact he could sing his favourite song again this week “Here’s to Sister Delicious”.
Knicker was charged for someone being lost, Knot head who arrived on a strange object called a
one wheel Hoverboard (I won’t be asking for a lift home) was charged for smoking in the circle,
and wearing a man bun, that was not as impressive as Top Knot’s. Then he had to tell a Dad Joke
about having to shoot a cat 8 times (The circle groaned). Flaps had a story, about a closed casket
for Donald Trump, Zorro was dry – not a single joke and Golly was charged by Raggedy Anne for
letting of wind. Mackay Hash Song was sung without the usual disruption (you know who you
are) and Streaker commented how nice for a change, then circle closed.

Then the pièce de résistance of hash meals continued, with the serving of Chicken, Bacon and
Sweet Corn Chowder with Garlic Bread, followed by Bread & Butter Pudding with walnuts and
cinnamon, accompanied with home-made custard and cream. It must have been good, as
Baagoose was on his way out when he realised there was desert and did an about face, and then
fronted up for two helpings. Wheelie Bin was also chowing down on the food, he was very
impatient waiting for it to cool down, keeping Top Knot busy with the spoon.
I hope you all enjoyed the marvellous McFanny feast, as next week I reckon you will be back to
standard Hash Nash, I cannot compete with that mastery of cooking.
Best to bring an umbrella, as you all know what usually happens at my runs.

Please also bring some extra cash next week for tickets in the $50.00 Seafood Voucher from
Debbie’s Seafood, $2 a ticket of 3 for $5, all money raised goes back to the club.
On On
Delicious

Run Date: 31st August 2020
Run No #2078
Hare: Smut
Venue: Muller Park Ooralea
Hashers: 23

A bright orange sunset behind the chimney smoke of the mill and the silver moon coming up behind us as we headed to Muller Park along Archibald street. We all gathered by 6pm and we were off on time. 69 Degrees would be proud of us.

Smut said it was set on lime and chalk but no piss stop. Its hard to get all of us to do the full trail set. Hitting the Peak Downs highway Pensioner turned back his knee was telling him so I tried to catch up to Screw who was leading the pack. Turning into Marlborough Avenue Plan lands the arrows pointed across the road with a slight bend in them which confused the front runners. It could go either way I thought. Catching Screw up he said he  couldn’t find any more marks, so I checked back to find Daffodil and Golly checking and Piccolo and Raggedy Anne at the arrows. Bargoose found the marks heading towards the Uni so we followed on to Boundary Road. The trail went right but only I followed. I kept checking for torch lights to follow me but no they headed home. I was on my pat ma lone.

Following the footpath skirting the Uni I seen others following the foot path into one of the Uni buildings no not Hashers. Feeling a little lonely I kept going following the clearly marked trail through the streets footpaths back to Woolies and home. Everyone back except me. Peanuts, Dips and Jatz biscuits to go with your beer or cider while Smut stirred and tasted his sausage stew to see if it was hot enough and not burning on his butane stove.  He was organised with many spare cartridges. All were catching up as Streaker was updating the run list. Tarzan called the circle and Smut was charged for his run and then called for jokes, charges or stories or limericks. Zorro told his joke which was directed at female problems and males missing out. Delicious got through her joke about a horse and a chicken. The punch line was you didn’t need a BMW to pull the chicks. Tonguer told an oldie and then Screw, Tarzan and F?king like water recited a few limericks. Delicious got a down down for putting coin into the bin instead of bottle tops. Streaker dobbed Half a Boat in for going to the wrong park but got to the start on time so both took a down down. Hash song sung Streaker tried to charge Pensioner to get singing lessons. Hash nosh was a Sausage and rice stew with heaps of veggies and fresh bread and butter. Very tastie. Thank You Smut. Another good night had by all.

OnOn

Corgi

Run Date: 24th August 2020
Run No #2077
Hares: Raggedy Anne & Golly
Venue: 4 Trochus Court Shoal Point
Hashers: 25

 

The scenic peninsula upon which Shoal Point is situated provided the backdrop for what is probably the most northerly reach of the Hash run range.

The typically eager bunch of twenty or so aspirants gathered, eager to pit their rogaining skills against a masterful Golly who delights in seamlessly blending suburbia with the marine environment.

Golly issued some incoherent instructions to himself (as no-one was listening), before sending off the hapless throng into the darkness, with only partial expectation that all would return.

A false trail onto the eastern beach spilt the group. However, one way or another, most appeared to have navigated at least a portion of the set run.

Back in the circle, down-downs were given for a couple of visiting runners whose names escape me, but from memory, one was to do with copulating near water.

Two Moons made a triumphant return from a near-death episode and sought to share his moving experience with the group, but in true Hash belligerence, was told to fuck-off and got a down-down for his efforts.

Participants sang themselves hoarse with two successive Hash Birthdays to Tounger and Lady Teflon.

One of our visiting runners, whose name escapes me, drew Delicious’s raffle in favour of Two Moons – I guess it was some consolation for no-one giving a stuff about his well-being.  

Raggedy then lifted the lids on an impressive range of crock-pots filled with pulled chicken and pumpkin soup.

After we had our fill and flogged a few cans of grog from the esky, we all pissed-off home.

On On

Smut

       

    

 

 

Run Date: 17th August 2020
Run No #2076
Hare: Prick
Venue: BBQ area back of North Mackay Bowls Club
Hashers: 18

 

18 Hashers arrived for Pricks run from BBQ area, back of North Mackay Bowls Club, Great Run, walk, Jog, limp, around goose ponds and surrounding streets, Tarzan, Wheely and TopKnot some how got lost, but eventually found their way home, Prick served up some hot potatoes, and flaps had some dips and biscuits left over from TGIF,  Circle was called, few jokes, Down Downs for JCF for no hash attire, returning Tourist Tongue, Hashy Birthday for Teflon, who was absent.

Hash song, then circle closed, Hash Nosh was served yummy beef stew, well done Prick, another great night of hashing, See you at our house next week, On On Raggedy Ann

Run No: #2075
Hare :   Hooker.
Venue:  Margaret Whoever Street.
Date: 10th August 2020

 

22 runners lined up at Hooker’s place. Eager to run they could be barely held back and bolted for the fray. The trail led thro the backstreets of North Mackay, close by the creek. Then on along the bike path, over Windmill Crossing and on down the path to Magpies. The trail went across the road but then fizzled. Some went on to Heaths Road, while others simply headed on back and followed the creek to the Shopping Centre near Hardly Normal and on home.

On home we were greeted with a great fire courtesy of Corgi, and spuds in butter 

This was followed by the circle, some good jokes, the Hash song, and then pumpkin soup and fresh bread. 

A good night all round. 

On on, Prick.

Run Date: 3rd August 2020
Run No #2074
Hare: Flaps
Venue: 17 Jarrah Street Andergrove
Hashers: 22

 

Roll call noted 22 Hashers made the effort to meet at 17 Jarrah Street to celebrate the culinary skills of ‘Flaps’ one of our 2 Hash Master Chefs. 

Of course NOWHERE near 22 of you lazy lot bothered to do the run so diligently & distinctly  marked  – 

Well to tell the truth, Flaps you’ve always been one of my ‘fav’s’; a fellow hasher that I see as trustworthy……………   Well dam! Because it’s my walk next week & this report, I thought I’d extend myself to do the whole run for a change. I will admit the piss-stop was refreshing & delicious.

However, bloody hell Flappsy, I’ll never trust you again! 1 hour & 10 minutes later I returned foot/knee sore & throat hoarse from whinging for the last 20 minutes. Thanks Teflon & Penny – I couldn’t have done it without you!

Acting Monk Zorro did a good job keeping things rolling with the usual crap. Thanks Zorro, good to see you contribute something, seeing as you don’t come for the exercise (the whole point of hash I thought?)

There were the usual down-downs including one for my birthday – oh & thanks Pensioner for drawing everyone’s attention to that for me ………..NOT! Jokes ummmmmm what’s happening on this front, could we make a bit of an effort to contribute here – it’s sad when we come to actually missing Pea Beau’s dreadful attempts at humour.

Everyone was glad to hear the end of the club hash song, to get into what we were all secretly  salivating about (especially the late arrival, non-walking bastards ) ….Flaps amazing food

Flaps you never disappoint. Dinner was amazing as was your wonderful fire.

Hash is at my place next week. See you all there! Hopefully I’ll remember and turn up on time! and maybe I’ll even be there when you all arrive! 

On On 

Hooker 

 

Run Date: 27th July 2020
Run No #2073
Hare: Streaker
Venue: 5/3 Hunter Street West Mackay
Hashers: 23

Monday nights are they just the best. Hashing.

23 hashers gathered at the grand master’s ( or is that mattress) place of residence for a gentle stroll through the streets of West Mackay. The hare then gave out the instructions, the trail was set using four white paws and two black shoes. Off along Hunter street then on to Nebo Road where everyone made it safely across the road.

Streaker had a surprise for everyone along the way. Was it a replica of the Taj Mahal, a three story  Georgian manor, no it was something far more exciting, a new set of traffic lights on Milton Street, the wonders of modern technology.

I thought someone was lost, or the police were checking we were social distancing as there was a helicopter flying around most of the night, as it turned out it was neither, just someone getting in a bit of practice flying at night.

Everyone made it back safely, Quickie got the fire going and everyone sat around keeping warm,  thanks to Corgi for the wood.

Down Down was given to the hare after much toing and froing from the kitchen to turn off the smoke alarm, lucky Streaker’s son was there to fix the problem. The bar b que was set alight and Hooker proceeded to cook the sausages under difficult circumstances, very little light and trouble with the gas, but thanks to Streaker’s son again the sausages and onions were under way.

Jokes were told, down downs given to Half a Boat, picked up the rum balls from Delicious’s place on Friday night, but then forgot them on Saturday morning and had to go back from City Gates to home to retrieve them. Zorro for going to get his special lighter to light the fire but ended up somewhere else, I think it was the Shamrock hotel. Quickie got one (a down down) for being a visiting hasher.

The song was sung and the circle closed. Out came the sausages, onions, bread and various sauces, back to the good old days. I was still disappointed there was no corned meat, however I have been assured there will be next time.

I want to thank the committee for a great weekend down at Clairview, everyone had a great time and looking forward to next year.

On on to 17 Jarrah Street next week. Flaps

 

  

Social weekend – Christmas in July 24-26th July