Date – 15/04/2024
Run -2270
Hare – Smut
Venue – 57 Bradman Drive, Glenella
Hashers: 22

A cloudy day cleared to sunshine getting that washing dried but a cloud threatening sky for the start of the run made us grab our umbrellas. Close to 6, Smut called everyone out the front and we were on the trail of blue arrows to find the piss stop. We followed the trail back out to Davey Street. Crossing over the road was a bit daring we thought but we managed to get the group back on track to find Hillside Terrace and then on down to find Smut waiting with his orange brew less the red wine. It was a healthy concoction Smut said. Straight forward to find home but I didn’t see the arrow that turned right into Farmer Street. On to Loudon Street and right into Pioneer brought us back to the foot path homeward bound. At Schapers Road we caught up with Zorro. The pack came home via the start arrows where the trail came in around Lilee Street. All back and beers in hand Smut called for the circle and gave us our history lesson on the Titanic. He charged himself for his well-marked 4k run and called for charges and jokes. Shocker had several cups of piss stop brew ready. Pensioner was charged for his dummy spit at Executive lunch- not happy no prawns! Flaps and Insex had a joke to tell and Prick had a returning runner sip.

Hash nosh was served, Chicken and Mushroom and a Beef and Chick Pea casserole with gluggy rice. The dishes were wiped clean, it was so tasty. Tim Tams for dessert. A good night was had by all and we scarred away the rain. Thanks to Smut and Rita    

On on

Daffodil & Corgi

Next week’s run,

Illawong Beach park – Beach Volley Ball side – Petrie Street

Date – 08/04/2024
Run -2269
Hare – Golly
Venue – 4 Trochus Court, Shoal Point
Hashers: 23

After a couple of weeks of lower than average attendance rates, the strong turnout of 23 regular, visiting and returning runners were greeted in the driveway by an enthusiastic Raggedy-Anne, who has been missing in action for a period due to some robust kitchen-based antics that Golly and Raggedy are not keen to discuss publicly.

Golly mustered the gathered throng in the cul-de-sac and when the banter had finally died down, proceeded to tell a bunch of lies – particularly the one about a second piss-stop.

No sooner had the rambling mass set off, there was confusion and this set the theme for the entire run. A piss-stop was found at the public park before a short walk back to base.

Pre-dinner drinks and hors d’oeuvres were served before the Monk call the circle to order. Following a lame history trip, a number of charges were laid, of which a few were levelled at returning runner, Blo Jo.

Visiting runners, Rough Red and Takeover along with returning runners Lassie, Tonto, Raggedy Anne plus Blo Jo were recognised.

Tarboy got rather excited when Lagos was mentioned during the history trip and shared with us an absolutely compelling Inter-Hash story – well it was compelling for Tarboy.

Flaps, as he typically does, managed to secure some genuine belly-laughs via his comic repertoire.

With circle closed, Golly swung into catering action with military style precision. Raggedy, who is typically the primary provedore is currently banned from the kitchen duties since she’s taken to free-style jumping off the benches.

With a solid fill of chicken and salad rolls, sweet biscuits washed down by a beverage of choice, weary old campaigners waddled off home to digest the food and the experience.

On ON

Smut

 

Date – 01/04/2024
Run – 2268
Hare – Pensioner
Venue – John Breen Park, North Mackay
Hashers: 14

Hi Hashers.

We all, 14 off us gathered at John Breen Park for run 2268, all ready for a good set out run, set by one off our finest hares. We all got mustered up to be told that the hare had it from Livio that it would be a waste of chalk as it would be washed out.

So, we were to have a Live Hare “Pensioner”. Of we set through the park, on to the road, not to far, some 50m when the so-called Hare said “you’re on your own” and went back to the esky, leaving the pack to decide who to lead us. On down the path to the first crossing, some went over, the others kept going to the next pathway.

We all found our way back to the booze and dip, no crackers as Pensioner had a man look and could not find them in the second bag.

Circled called. No history lesson, very disappointing, charges taken, Pensioner we all know what for. Tar Boy for pole dancing and others I can’t remember, some jokes and stories, song sung.

Food came out, Savory Mince and Potato Bake, very nice, Mango. Dessert – biscuits.  We all stood around and got all the go, on what to expect, if you get covid, from our one and only Uturn.

See you at Shoal Point Monday.

ON_ON GOLLY. 

                        

                      

 

Date – 25/03/20234
Run -2267
Hare – Tonguer
Venue – 12 Hill End Road, Glenella
Hashers: 12

HashTrash 2267….Tonguer’s joint

Having heard on the grapevine that Tonguer WASN’T firing up the pizza oven, the usual hashers stayed away in droves, leaving a rather motley ragtag mob of 12 to carry on the traditional hash. The first thing we spotted on arrival was a very bedraggled looking Curlew laying on the concrete in front of said pizza oven. Surely not curlew pizza? Nah, not even Tonguer could be that cruel.

Shocker decided to drive into the backyard of Mum n Dad’s place, and immediately threw up on the lawn, then disappeared into Mummies arms, and upstairs into his childhood room, not to be seen again all night.

Realizing no one else was coming Tonguer herded us out the gate and mumbled something about chalk and arrows, so off we went. Soon discovering the arrows had no heads, instead being simple white lines here and there. Knicker and myself decided to short cut back to the beer, when bugger me, front runner Corgi caught us up, which put us firmly in line for a place on the podium…. If we had a podium, and if we was competitive.

Cash collected, it was circle time. Hmmm. No monk. And no monkee. Zorro! Step up. Which he did. No history lesson tonight. A few quick down downs and a coupla jokes and it was singsong time and over.  Tonguer and his good wife Wendy then lugged down a pile of tucker, enough to feed an army. A pot of spuds, another of taco type mince, bowls of tomato, lettuce, cheese…. All followed by apple crumble. Which all meant plenty leftovers for Tonguer in the next few weeks.

Plenty of yarns from the faithful few over the next hour or so, and then everyone started to trickle off home.

Next week it’s off to our favorite park Jim Beam…..er, I mean John Breen, North Mackay.

OnOn

Pensch.

 

Date – 18/03/2024
Run -2266
Hare – Piccolo
Venue – 82 Grendon Street, North Mackay
Hashers: 23

A good herd of hashers strolled into Piccolo’s for Run 2266.

Off out front, with Piccolo leading the way around North Mackay, for tonight’s run and returning with all the hashers eventually.

Numerous returning runners in tonight, and beers sculled by the thirsty ones out front.

Hashy birthday chocolates for Snot, and Insex for last week.

2 Sausage hot pots for Nosh and wafer biscuits for sweets, proved to be plenty enough for all the hungry hashers, even harder to believe, leftovers!

Thank you, Piccolo.

On On

Matches.

 

 

 

Date – 11/03/2024
Run – 2265
Hare – Juice
Venue – 12 Barclays Road, Dumbleton
Hashers: 16

An interested bunch of hashers turned up tonight for the run.

The Hare set us off around the perimeter of their green pastures, and the grass was rather sodden in places, onto the 3 hills down Barclays Road. The good hashers were rewarded with a piss stop of a Butterscotch Liqueur mix.

Back at Juice and Termite’s abode for nosh to eat, beers to drink, a possible jab from Piccolo’s brolly.

To finish the evening, Juice gave the hashers a treat, a very nice iced chocolate cup cake, for each of us.

Thankyou Juice and Termite.

On On Matches.         

                   

Date – 04 March 2024
Run – 2264
Hare – Snot
Venue – 19 Tern Street, Slade Point
Hashers: 16

Always a pleasant outlook from Tern Street and the Hare promised a beachified urban stroll. The group kept together until the end of Tern Street with a car appearing to shepherd us from behind. It was creepy but the car finally inched past with Snot at the wheel. The car turned to the right down Slade Point Road and the hesitant hashers were able to then set their course eastwards.

Before the walk the hare had informed us that the trail was marked on the LHS and so it was, very clearly. It was difficult to keep track of which streets we passed along as there were many – Ibis, Lyrebird, Rosella, Magpie meshed into one. Maybe we didn’t even enter those streets, who knows??  The front walkers appeared to have set a speedy pace in spite of the warm afternoon and soon the walkers were strung out. The Slade Point Nature Reserve loomed ahead but thankfully the Hare led us elsewhere away from mosquitoes, scummy water, mud, frogs etc.  Eventually, after turning many corners the piss stop came into view on a vacant allotment. We had it on good authority that the brew was a mixture of all sorts. After the natterers who had been at the back of the pack quenched their thirst, we set off for the short distance home.

Back at Tern St we delved into crackers and a very edible dip. Smut rounded up the crew for the circle but the Monkee was otherwise engaged and had to be called to order (he’d had a busy weekend and workday). Once drinks were set up we were treated to a historical account from Smut on the Hindenburg which appeared to be more interesting than the usual fare, Unfortunately for hashers standing at the back of the circle Snot sprayed the exposed part of his head with a tropical strength repellent and fumigated both mosquitoes and people.  You might say it was a slow evening but that was because Flaps was resting on his laurels and was not prepared with a joke. In the end he told a joke that I didn’t get and I don’t want anyone to explain it to me either!!  The monk deftly returned attention to the circle when Snot, Shocker, Golly chatted about a boat seen on the walk. They obviously found it to be more interesting than the night’s proceedings. The monk also had to use his negotiation skills around some of the charges. I don’t know what else happened because I was dealing with the after effects of fumigation and I was ready to eat.

And eat we did. Thinly sliced corned meat, boiled potatoes (boiled to perfection says Termite) and a more please white sauce. Definitely a fitting end to the evening, Insex and Snot.

ON ON

JUICE

                       

Date – 26/02/2024
Run – 2263
Hare – Screw
Venue – Mackay Bowls Club
Hashers: 18

Let’s start by congratulating Zorro on approving a pub run, -it’s he forgot to send it to hash cash but all went well, we all bought draft beer for free.

I’d estimate that there were probably between 18-20 hashers there, as there was confusion on my part being that we visited HotRocks and Driptray for a piss stop. Also, we had a guest of honour, Baagoose, he appeared quite well although he reminded me of Joe Biden at times.

Circle opened by Smut who gave us his usual history lesson about bygone years, once again we were all enthralled by past events and look forward to next weeks thrilling episode of a bygone era.

Fines. Returning runners: Prick & Baagoose.

There were a few others but inconsequential in the scheme of things. We then partook in the culinary delights as served a few thousand runs prior. A bonus was the gluten free Tim Tams for the fussy tummies of a few of us.

There were a few jokes, and usual banter then I got tired and went home.

On On

Snot 

Jokes

**Every time a little boy went to a playmate’s house, he found the grandmother deeply engrossed in her bible. Finally, his curiosity got the better of him.
“Why do you suppose your grandmother reads the bible so much?” He asked.
I’m not sure”, said his friend, “But I think she’s cramming for her finals”.

**Rushing up to a large airline’s counter, a man gasped, “Miss, please help me. I have to get to Chicago in the worst way!” The clerk calmly pointed to the left and said, “Sir, that would be the airline next to us.”

**“Nothing looks good to me anymore,” wailed a customer modelling an outfit in front of the department store’s mirror. “Nonsense, ma’am,” soothed the salesclerk. “That dress says it all.” “That’s the problem,” the woman replied “I need a dress that keeps its mouth shut.”

**Restaurant Patron: “Waiter, I’d like a bottle of wine:
Waiter: “What year, sir?”
Patron: “Well, I’d like it right now”

 

                          

                      

 

Date – 19/02/2024
Run – 2262
Hare – Smut
Venue – 57 Bradman Drive, Glenella
Hashers: 19

19 eagers hashers turned up at Smut’s abode on a warm and cloudy night. The Hare called us out front to give directions adding there was a piss-stop. The pack headed off to find the promised piss-stop. Soon they came across a police siege and after having a captain cook they scurried along, following the trail to a piss-stop and then on home.

The bullshite muttering started amongst them until the Monk called the circle. There was the ‘usual’ history lesson, charges, some jokes and stories were told. No news from the GM or On Sec. The song was sung and the circle closed.

Nosh was served and very tasty it was – the usual Tim Tams for desserts. Some more piss was drunk and shite talked, until it was time to head home. Thanks for your hospitality Smut!

See you next week at the Mackay Bowls Club in the back car park on Nebo Road.

On-On Screw!

                      

 

Date – 12/02/2024
Run – 2261
Hare – Shocker
Venue – The Park, Sturt Crescent, Settlers Rise.
Hashers: 15

We were the second last to arrive at Sturt Crescent Park followed by Termite less Juice, who was away partying in Brisbane. The sun was still glaring down on us, so just past six we checked Tarzans watch and yes 69 degrees would have called time to go Tarzan recalled.

Shocker said he was doing live hare tonight due to the rain overnight. We missed seeing Landen on his scooter beside Shocker. Off we headed towards the entrance to go up and around to the first view point and then down and around and up to the highest view point which made the heart rate go up. The last hill was too much for some and they headed home instead of reaching the drink stop at the next park. The air clear, you could smell the fires in the back yards pushing out black smoke. At the drink stop Shocker produced a concoction of solo and plenty of gin he warned us. Just six of us completed the whole run, the SCB’s would taste the concoction for their down downs.

Back at Shockers we found Flaps, Nicker, Snot & Insex looking after the fire for tonight’s BBQ. Yes, sausages for a change with tomatoes, cheese, fried onions, sauces and bread.

I think Shocker likes popcorn. Nibbles of cheese, pickled onions, black & green olives, dried tomatoes and Jatz biscuits followed by popcorn filled us up before the circle. No Smut tonight, Shocker was doing it all. Golly helped out with the down downs. Charges were for the short cutters and Pensioner and Tonguer who didn’t turn up for Executive Lunch last week. Jokes/ Stories were told by Insex and Flaps. Circle over and song sung Shocker cooked the sausages and onions which went down a treat followed by Tim Tams. Stars still out, there was a light sprinkle of rain and then it stopped and we enjoyed the rest of the night.

On On

Corgi & Daffodil