Run Date: 26/01/2026
Run No: 2365
Hare: Committee Run
Venue: Surf Club Park, Mackay Harbour
Hashers: 13

A small group of intrepid hashers headed to the beach for a fun filled evening. After feasting on beer and Vegemite sangers the festivities started with a game of Bocce with the hotly contested final won by Piccolo. The Thong Toss brought out fits of laughter as well as a few kind swear words to egg on the lazy few that tried their hand. Piccolo threw a phenomenal length (measured by Harbour and Tarzan) of 19.9 metres. Raggedy Ann demonstrated a new thong idea and a bunch of willing hashers tried their hand at balancing a beer can on aforementioned thong over a distance of some 60 metres or so with the fastest time being the winner. Snot was BOOED! Very loudly with his effort of squashing the can and holding it on the thong with his thumb!!!! Mrs Appeel was the eventual winner with a speedy time of 1minute 19.66 seconds.

Frivolities aside and Golly and Snot took on the chef duties for the very welcome snags. Salads and bread rounded out the feast with a grand finale of pavlova and lamingtons. Circle held, jokes told, mossies swatted by the hundreds and soon it was )On! On! after last drinks called.

Mrs Appeel.

Next week’s run is from Camilleri Park, Blacks Beach

Run No:   2364
Date:         19/01/26
Hare:         Prick
Venue        1 Kenzey Street, North Mackay
Hashers:    approximately 20

We assembled at Pricks abode in anticipation of a thrilling evening. At 6.01 pm we were given directions that it would be a short run.

This apparently pleased several but not as much as The Beerhunters as the Bowls club was only 300 meters away. The pack ventured West and the Beer was to the East. In the interests of journalism I decided to cover the Beerhunters journey.

The were thrilled to discover that membership lasted 3 years here. So it wasn’t long before the drinks flowed freely. Food was ordered by the GM as she is gluten intolerant.wine and more beer was consumed before the return to venue.

I made enquiries regarding the run which was met with little response. I had to wait till the circle when Tarzan announced that it was a shit hot run.

The circle resulted in a few jokes, a few fines, no returning runners although Uturn IMO should have been fined. The GM and former GMs had a drink for fu.. knows why. She should have been disciplined for forgetting the cutlery tho.

At this point I should point out there were no party pies but a spaghetti conccuction which tasted real nice.

NEXT WEEK our first committee run on Australia Day weekend. New start time 4 pm for a 4.30 start.

The eastern end of the Harbour Park

Expect sausage sizzle, Vegemite sandwiches, Tim Tams
Games
Beer, wine, and bikkies
Wear some Aussie gear and wear thongs

On on
Snot
Bill Lucas
0418 185 661

Date – 12/01/2026
Run -2363
Hare – Snot & Insex
Venue – 19 Tern St, Slade Point
Hashers: ?

The weather had been threatening all day and it was possible that there could be a deluge on the Hash run. However it held off and the run was a leisurely pace around the Slade Point streets. There were no set marks so the pack was under the direction of the hare. The pack was split as some returned to home early.

Back in Tern street the walkers ate biscuits, dips and nice meatballs. Usual chitchat before Zorro took over Smut’s role in guiding the night’s proceedings. Tarzan was also absent so others stepped up to start the ball rolling.  Gravel Rash was welcomed back as a returning runner. She has an upcoming birthday and Golly was sternly put in his place for trying to muscle in and collect his birthday dues.

A welcome meal was enjoyed by all: corn meat, potato salad and two other dishes.

People then chatted amongst themselves then headed home.

Juice

Run Date: 05/01/2026
Run No: 2362
Hare: Pensioner & Mango
Venue: John Breen Park, North Mackay
Hashers: 19

Twas a night to remember mainly because of the millions of blood sucking mossies. And Pensioners statement it was to be a live hare. Said to myself Pensh is lucky to be outta sight after an hour on a dark night but his co-hare Mango stepped up to the plate to help out.        

This is where the Beerhunters amongst us decided they will be gone for ages so Zorro and Snot took off to the Kooyong in a commandeered vehicle. But I digress, the peloton headed off toward the Goosies, surprise, no piss-stop no hills, no shiggy, Tarzan and Insex did a loop around a big tree and returned to the venue.        

The Beerhunters returned and at least 1 hasher was happy to see us back, her special brew was in the commandeered vehicle. After much fuss things returned to normal as we awaited the circle.   Zorro, the stand in monk took charge and duly delivered charges, took charges from the floor, jokes told etc. circle closed song sung then into the food.

Mango did two wet dishes; one had mangoes as a principal ingredient. Very nice too. We had to dodge a few showers and after a bit we all headed off home.

On On 

 Snot

Next week we all gather at 19 Tern Street Slade Point.

Run Date: 29/12/2025
Run No: 2361
Hare: Zorro
Venue: Glenwood Park, Andergrove
Hashers: 19 

19 sturdy walkers gathered at the private road that leads to Zorro/Matches private abode among the giant paperbarks leading down to McCready’s creek, which in turn housed an upside down and therefore dead crocodilian. Many hashers were sitting on the deck looking at the pool, and wondering if Zorro had turned the weather cool enough to stop us jumping into said pool, and possibly pissing in there.

Anyway…. Zorro called us forth and pointed out some chalk arrows. 7 of the

19 in attendance set off on the trail, whilst the SCB’s headed straight back to the beer. The walkers encountered Zorro’s private army of plovers who screamed merrily overhead and herded us along a few Andergrove streets leading us back from whence we came.

Bikkies n beer later Zorro the hare also became Zorro the monk in the absence of the real monk.  Thankfully Zorro had no history lesson, so moved on to charges (about 3, can’t remember) and jokes (about 3, again can’t remember) and a down down for returning/visiting hasher Chuck. And so…. On to the tucker. Zorro, always a stickler for exact amounts, produced 19 burgers for 19

peeps….. well done, no leftovers that way. More drinks were drunk, more bull talked until the heard started to wander off.

And so ended hash for 2025. See y’all in 2026,

Pensch.

Date – 15th December 2025
Run – 2359
Hare – Smut 
Venue – 20 Royal Blvd in Glenella
Hashers: 20ish

Last week’s run report mentioned Smut and the Smut house in Glenella. Wrong!

It was a joint effort from Harbour and Mrs Appeel at Camilleri Park.

This week, however, it was indeed held at Smut’s den of inequity at 20 Royal Blvd in Glenella.

About 18 or so Hashers rocked up, and eagerly awaited instruction form the hare. Before that however, there was a near mutiny because Termite wanted to lock the Piss-car, whilst other SCBs demanded it remain unlocked. Fearing significant injury, Termite decided it was safer to leave the doors ajar.

Sorted… the hare pointed out blue arrows, a portable piss-stop in the backpack slung nonchalantly over a shoulder, and a dire warning about some kamikaze magpies awaiting their next victim.

So… off we trotted around the Royal neighbourhood, where we enviously observed many fine houses of the large variety, some with new caravans, and several with flash boats, and many householders watering their lawns as a lowly herd of old timers shuffled past.

Eventually, we found Glenella school, where the hare decided to offload his piss-pack burden. It was also here that the kamikaze maggies where observed sitting on the powerlines, just waiting for their victims. Maybe we looked sufficiently battered at this stage, as they didn’t swoop at all, but merely watched and giggled. Refreshments served, it was time to return to the House of Smut. Bikkies n beer in hand, the general stuff was bantered about, until the circle was called, and the Monk gave himself a down down for also being hare. There was a returning runner down down for Mango, and a welcome sip for visitor Matt. A few paltry jokes were told, and a couple of true stories, but since I didn’t know at that stage that I would be conned into writing this report, I didn’t bother to take any notice. Oops. Nearly forgot the Monk’s diatribe on Christmas History, or some such shit.

Circle shut, it time to gobble down curried snags, chicken risotto, and doul, whatever that is. Add bread, beer and bullshit, and there you have it… instant hash nosh!

The chit-chat continued on as usual, then it was time to pack up our toys, and head for home, leaving Smut to clean up his mess.

Next week it’s the Christmas Party at the home of Tarzan and U Turn.

OnOn Pensch

Date: 08/12/25
Run #2358
Venue: Camilleri Park  – 89-97 Camilleri St, Dolphin Heads
Hare: Mrs Apeel
Hashers 18

18 enthusiastic hashers descended upon Camilleri Park for a spirited bout of fellowship before the hare (Mrs Appeal) gathered a solid cohort of rogainers together to issue run instructions.

Despite a check at the start, the lead pack correctly headed seaward, encountering a pleasant forest trail before descending down a significant set of stairs where the hare was eagerly awaiting with a tasty piss-stop.

Pleasant beachscape scenery was taken in while sampling the liquid offering before continuing on the trail. Soon after, a check was encountered. One arrow pointed towards home, but despite losing trail, the bulk of the runners, led by hi-viz clad Zorro, elected to abandon any effort to find trail and headed home via the shortest possible route.

Corgi, Daffodil and the author chose to respect Mrs Appeal and Harbour’s efforts and follow all the arrows and complete the nearly 3km trail.

The circle was formed and the hare was charged twice – one on behalf of Harbour in absentia. A sluggish charge session was followed by an even more sluggish joke session. The gathering was reminded of the up-cuming Hashy Christmas run to be hosted by U-Turn and Tarzan on 22 December.

Tarzan then invoked the new system for selecting Executive Lunch venues, with Fusion being the lucky recipient.

With the club song sung and circle closed, the gathering tucked into a generous helping of cold corn beef and salad followed by a very tasty homemade slice.

See you this cuming Monday at 20 Royal Boulevard, Glenella.

On On

Smut

Date – 1 December, 2025
Run – 2357
Hare – Snot and Insex
Venue – 20 Tern Street, Slade Point
Hashers: 20-22

A few (approx. 20) runners turned up at Snot and Insex’s place, way out at Slade Point, to engage in another enthralling evening of walking and talking and feasting. The motley crew set off following a trail of big bird droppings around the streets of Sladie evading the erratic parking of Zorro’s truck. 

On return to the home abode Insex produced some little boys that were quickly gobbled up by the awaiting flock of Hashers. Circle was formed and the monk apologised for not having any fun facts to share. Charges were laid, Zorro for that amazing job of parking his truck, Pensch for becoming a grandad again and some other charges quickly forgotten. Jokes and stories told, lunch decided upon and then off to get the feedbags on. Gobs stuffed and the crowd quietened down.

Later on the sounds of On, On echoed through the town as some well fed Hashers headed of to the wilds of Mackay and surrounds.

See you all at Camilleri Park next week.  On-on, Mrs Apeel

Date – 24 November, 2025
Run – 2356
Hare – Shocker
Venue – 4/23 Sunset Blvd, Erakala
Hashers: 20

Run report, for run 2356…it was held at Shockers Abode, a western escarpment at Sunset Rise

At a guess I’d say we all assembled at Sunset Park. Anyway around 20 increasingly decrepit souls, some of whom shuddered at the thought of the hilly terrain. Me I was so terrified I headed back to my car and was joined by 5 others assembled at 4\23 Sunset Blvd awaiting Termite’s appearance with the piss.

I have it on good authority (Daffodil) that the trail went up and down, up and down hills and across allegedly snake infested lawns.(Auto sprinklers on lawns set for around 6.15) Designed to keep walkers off their grass.

No one was injured, no one died, all were accounted for at the end of the day..good run.

Meanwhile back at the venue Termite had arrived along with his box of goodies, Shocker dispensed the mandatory nibbles, a voice called ON YER FEET YOU BASTARDS AND CIRCLE UP. The monk had spoken.

A sermon was preached but alas I am none the wiser for this well researched topic as I may have been in deep conversation with Juice about caravanning. All of a sudden, reality hit, HARE front and centre! then democratically votes were taken regarding the run. None of which has anything to do with anything as the Hare always gets a down down regardless of the vote. 

Fines: Returning runners Snot, Zorro. What a top drink! Zorro and I discussed fining each other until it was all gone.

Maple syrup for changing the masthead with new after office bearers names.

There were others but I went back to caravanning with Juice.

Maple told a joke. With the Monk being hungry the circle sang the Mackay song and circle was cloze-ed.

Out came a delicious Chicken Moroccan and rice dish which when finished I found I was tired so I went home to the sick Insex.

On on

Snot