Run Date: 15th February 2016
Run No #1843
Hare: Prick
Venue:  Gooseponds & Kenzey Street North Mackay
Hashers: 32

32 Hashers came out of the woodwork for Prick’s run at the Gooseponds. Even Snot managed to come back from his escapades to join us. Prick said at the start that it was 4.048kms, but Pensioner claimed he & JCF did exactly that amount by short-cutting. Everyone else went way too far! Meanwhile back at Kenzey Street stragglers made their way through the gate & managed to find the eskies. Lots of chitter chatter going as chairs were shuffled around and brought in to take their spot in Prick’s backyard joining the mosquitoes where they were having a party on their own.

Prick brought out a huge pot of boiled potatoes out to keep us going while the circle was called.

Pensch & Golly called the circle…number of charges for:-

Sweetmeat for something to do with Hamo or should it be WHP…

Tounger for something to do with Sweetmeat…

Cummalott for something returned to her – can’t remember what…

JCF for something…was it returning runner and then I think there was more charges

Snot for something… (or did I make that up)

For Virgin runner Ryan (Golly’s friend)

Smegma for not wearing Hash Attire, which he managed to have reversed, good one Smegma you got them – no one looked at your back!

Delicious for something.. was that the reverse charge for Smegma

The Monk put his attire on and we dropped to our knees for Daphine’s christening which resulted in her now being called ‘Piccolo Pirata’ Italian for ‘Little Pirate’ – Monk put it to the circle was it to be ‘PP’ or ‘Piccolo’ for short. Piccolo took the vote hands down. Piccolo was then welcomed into the group as she made her way around the circle. Welcome Piccolo once again.  

 

 

 

 

Delicious reminded everyone about the progressive walk/bike run on Saturday 12th March.

Hash song sung, circle closed and Prick brought out his sliced Corn Meat which went down very nicely with fresh bread and all sorts of condiments.

On On
Teflon

Run Date: 8th February 2016
Run No #1842
Hare: Popeye
Venue:  Richmonds Hills Park
Hashers: 13

 

Oh what a lovely run! A pitiful 13 runners turned up for the run of the year; best venue, best piss, best tucker and best company.

The weather was cool as were the participants. We covered a bit of road, a bit of mud, a stream, some hills some dry periods and rain. We went up and we went down.

The on on was great with a short circle, a few down downs and then some great hash tucker cooked by Popeye. This will give everyone a new standard to aspire to.

Then we were tired and went home to Mum.

On on. Prick.

Run Date: 1^st February 2016
Run No #1841
Hare: Tounger
Venue:  12 Hill End Road, Glenella
Hashers: 29

The run was set in indelable pink painted marks starting from Tounger’s  place in beautiful uptown Glenella , and 30 odd, (and some odd looking)  hashers departed promptly just after six pm, following a well marked trail, with the live hare going on the entire run, just to officiate the course.

It didn’t  take long for the usual SCB’s to peel off at their earliest opportunity, and head back home to a well undeserved beer, and the promise of a full belly of  glorious wood-fired pizza.

Those that did the full run were rewarded with a great scenic tour of the highlights on the bright sights of North Mackay area, and a cooling, lite fall of rain, to nicely cleanse away the sweat.

After the first nicely chilled beverages were consumed, and everyone forked out their hard earnt oxford schollars, the circle was called, and the usual semi, funny jokes were doled out, including a well responded, if, very long winded, funny from our ever-popular Knothead, after which he was rewarded with a cold tun down his throat.

The executive lunch venue was anounced, and next weeks run by Popeye is to be at the Richmond Hills park, off Dawson Blvd, which is out from Mackay/Habana Rd, 2nd turn on right from the Mackay Golf club roundabout. That’s  just 15 mins from the CBD, for those slack darksiders that will complain that they can’t possibly travel that far out of town. 😢

ON ON and on behalf of Popeye. Cheers fron Viagra

Run Date: 25^th January, 2016
Run No #1840
Hare: Drip Tray & Cummalott
Venue: Northview Gardens Park on the Corner of Schapers Road & Royal Boulevard, Glenella.
Hashers: 25

 

No run report this week.

Run Date: 18^th January, 2016
Run No #1839
Hare: Oui Oui & Champion
Venue: 60 Wattle Street Andergrove
Hashers: 18

Hashers gathered amongst the wildes of the Andergrove bushland. Very excited for their free mangoes and mossie bites. We set off following a live hare whose only apparent intent was to show off his piece of paradise. 15minutes later the hashers escaped the compound and headed out into the real world.

 

Much oohing and aahing was heard from the group as we passed some impressive parcels of land, meanwhile we were being tailed by a very suspicious looking vehicle driven by an even more suspicious driver.

 

On back to hash piss. The lack of an outer-space visible bonfire was no doubt due to the absence of Corgi.   Circle was called and down downs and jokes followed. Circle closed with the reprise of ye olde hash ballad.

 

Yummy hash nosh was washed down with even yummier hash piss and the night ended with disappointed mango-loving hashers only taking home their free mossie bites. Although pensioner still got to take his home.

 

 On On DT

Run Date: 11^th January, 2016
Run No #1838
Hare: Sweetmeat (with Shocker’s Assistance)
Venue: 148B Kippen Street, South Mackay
Hashers: 22

 

We arrived at Sweat Meats place, an Old Queenslander and sat around greeting people. Lassie and Tonto turned up second week in a row. Sweet Meat gave instructions for the run and we set off down the streets through the heat and humidity and road works. Passed a car that smashed into a house with police and ambulance carrying out the dead. One look at this, Lassie and others turned to Delicious for direction. Who took control and Lassie and Oui Oui were then driven to the Country Club for stress relief. One small beer was bought, a nice couple saw our stress and bought us another larger one.

On our return, the pack was being relieved of their money. The circle was called. Jokes were told and everybody laughed (had too).

Gollie was sung Hashy Birthday.

Hooker got a down down for being on the phone making money and not sharing it with us.

New Hash Down Down songs were sung and than we reverted to the old ones.

Sweet Meat and father PJ got a down down for riding a Harley.

Wonder Bra lost her earring and Tonger lost his keys. Oui Oui got a down down for his hat being stolen by Pensioner (Snot was not there). Pensioner also returned Oui Oui’s mug that he stole that night. That’s Snot, Hotrocks and now Pensioner they’re all Kleptomaniacs.

Delicious finally got her Full Moon mug for being the best Sexretary ond the only committee member for Full Moon Hash.

We then had good healthy food made by Sweet Meat. I know why she looks so skinnie and healthy. Kept drinking and talking bull shit. Stole some beer and went home.

Oui  Oui

Run Date: 4^th January, 2016
Run No #1837
Hare: Mango & Pensioner
Venue: 12 Douglas Crescent, Rural View
Hashers: 18

 

Well, all the Hashers had gathered, champing at the bit, for the word had got around, that the Hare had set a run, and they were equal to the frey???  WTF!!!  Is this from the Hare from Snowy River, or something???

Pensioner had apparently set the run, but rain had somehow washed away the marks, OH D-OHH?

So he came up with a briliant idea of having a Great Race style run, complete with secret clues and directions in numbered envelopes , openned in order, at every check.

Anyway, the resulting run worked out well, with us touring out and around the hills of Northern Beaches district via Woolies, then back home with only a slight sprinkling of rain, which kept us all nicely cooled during the run.

Back home at Pensh and Mango’s place, the nibblies came out, followed by a timely circle,with the usual mildly funny jokes told, then some returning runners honoured with a cold tun down their throats.

Then out came a glorious feast of Curnal Bogies Buggered Bird, with potato ratatouille, tossed rocket salad, and hot garlic bread. Very well done Mango,

An evening of hot gossip, and even hotter bullshit was both swapped, and enjoyed by all.

Which left us all hungering for an even better run from Sweetie next week at Kippen Street on the dark side of town.

ON ON Viagra 

Run Date: 28th December, 2015
Run No #1836
Hare: Cummalott
Venue: 20 Hawkins Street Bucasia
Hashers: 15

Cummalott found an empty house in Bucasia, so, like a bunch of squatters we moved in. With the festive season in full swing only 15 Hashers turned up to brave the elements…… well, only 13 to start with, before WHP got a call from Daffodil asking where the hell was everyone….. seems he and Corgi had missed the change of venue email, and turned up to a very lonely Botanic Gardens. A quick realignment of the SatNav saw them heading to the Bright Side of Bucasia (actually, it was getting quite dark as storm clouds loomed). After waiting 20 minutes, we decided stuff em, they ain’t comin, so off we went down the hill and around the corner, when in rolled the aforementioned Corgi & Daff, who quickly ditched the car and joined the fray. Across the main road and into the back streets and round and round Bucasia, with the rain getting ever closer, eventually we all returned to the squat. Amid tales of Chrissy Dinner, cash was collected and, after The Monkee had put out some Tun to get warm, the circle was called. A request from last week for some new hash songs was delivered upon, your Monk having done a Google search for hash downdown songs….. easy to find, everyone can have a go!. Down downs were delivered to the Hare Cummalott, Viagra for his 69^th birthday, WHP’s son Klinger got 2, one for being a return runner, another for telling a woeful joke, and WHP had one for being on call and answering the phone. Even your Monk had a taste, for reasons that defy belief (insert….. can’t remember) A few more jokes from the Monkee and the Monk and we ran outta things to do. We sang the Hash Song with gusto, and then, before closing, and acting on another request, your Monk revealed a magnificent tenor voice, and delivered a new Hash Song. So now we have 2 to choose from. (Delicious will distribute some copies next week)
Circle closed, and we settled in for a beer or two, followed by a tasty chille sausage stew with spuds and bread, quickly gobbled down. Then, remarkably, the talk turned to how Daffodil got his name, something about Daffodil margarine and taste buds on your tongue, at which point Daff unfurled quite possibly the world’s longest tongue. Squeals of delight from certain Harriettes saw Corgi cringe in embarrassment, whilst the blokes shook their heads and had another beer.
Then the assembled crew bagan to wander off home, leaving Cummalott to squat alone.
Next  week’s run will be from our place…12 Douglas Cres Rural View. Bring your mountain boots.

On On, The Monk.

Run Date: 21^st December, 2015
Run No #1835
Hares: Delicious
Venue: 17 Tropical Ave Andergrove
Hashers: 24

A fairly decent gathering turned up to get drowned at a “Delicious Run’. Well the clouds were there but didn’t hold up to expectation and hashers returned very dry in more ways than 1. The run was well marked and took us through the wilds of Andergrove, a feature being a walk through the Black Forest – Mwahahaha – (insert scary laugh here).

Back at Casa Delish, drinks were had then circle called. Visiting Runner, No Name Sam was looking very fetching in the new t-shirt. Down downs were then had by virgin hashers,  WTFA-Todd and WTFA-Daphine, with Cumalott earning 1 for jumping the gun.

Circle closed and Hash Nosh was on.

Another successful run was over. And Merry Hashmas to all.

Cumalott

 

Run Date: 14th December, 2015
Run No #1834
Hares: Hooker & Hot Rocks
Venue: 4 Pharlap Parade Ooralea
Hashers: 36

 

36 intrepid hashers turned up at Hooker’s new abode….. yep, the Christmas Party brings em outta the woodwork.

With the usual milling around and access to the beer, the run looked like a non-event, until Hotrocks called the faithful together. Muttering something about chalk, left or right side, follow me, and Smegma has a surprise in store…..off the pack went. At the first check Hotty encouraged the mob to head straight on, before gleefully calling them back after a mile or so, then ran quickly out of sight chasing Sweetmeat. About this time Flaps and myself decided our jointly buggered knees wouldn’t stand up to another Hotrocks Marathon and headed back to the beer, where we found 8 or 9 likewise physically retarded pissheads joyfully sucking away on coldies. The mob, apparently, roamed around the Depths of the Darkside in Ooralea before entering the esteemed Boomerang Pub for a refreshing piss-stop. And not a Smegma in sight. Eventually they all wandered back in dribs and drabs, and settled in around the eskies. The Smegma Surprise turned out to be his trip to the Sunshine Coast, so yes, we were surprised. But really couldn’t care less.

Being a Chrissy Party, a big box of prawns was produced, which were quickly gobbled down by a ravenous horde, until eventually all that was left were prawn heads, which OuiOui snaffled to take home to feed his fish…… but I suspect were more likely turned into a seafood stew or some such. HashCash called for money, after which the Esteemed Monkee called for a circle to be formed, along with a warning that those who interrupted The Monk would be Tunned immediately. At which point Pants, never one to keep quiet, was called forth for the first delightful Tun down-down. Which, I presume, had an adverse effect, judging by the wobbly boot she soon displayed. DownDowns for the hare Hotrocks, and host Hooker followed, and then the jokes and charges flowed. Newby Brian had a delightful drink from his new shoe, Hooker’s daughter Ebony, and friend Linda also  tasted the wonderous Tun. A blast from the past, in the form of Trickle was called up for a returning runner sip, but disgraced herself for claiming our esteemed Tun tasted, in fact, like shit. We already knew that. McFanny called Cummalott forward, and returned her pilfered 50 run cap, taken mere minutes after being presented, and earning Cummalott a nice Tun. A second Tun was moments away, as the cap, worn whilst still in the circle, was quickly removed. GM Zorro had a drink for being in the Bowls Final leading the men’s hash team. More jokes, some good, some woeful, entertained the pack, until finally the circle closed with a rousing rendition of the Hash Song.

It was around this time that Radish sauntered in, still in work attire and covered in grease and coaldust, which triggered frightful memories for us retirees.

Then it was into the nosh…… ham, chicken, potato bake, salads, fresh rolls…. all stuffed down to keep the prawns company. More beers, until, as if by magic, Santa arrived with his little helper, to hand out presents to the assembly. Santa’s suit was a little ill-fitting, and Flaps ‘d around a bit, especially when sat upon by willing Harriettes, and more than a few Harriers….. (you’re a sick man OuiOui). A final indignation was the flashing of Santa by the slightly wobbly Pants.

Pressies were stashed away, and out came desert……. more food…… rum cake and non-rum cake and rum balls and custard and ice cream and trifle and apricot balls……

And about this time fully stuffed Hashers started to wobble off home.

All in all, a great night and a great success.

Many thanks go to the committee members who all chipped in to create the evening and brought along all the goodies.

 

OnOn…….

The Monk.

 

Just a few pics from the night.